When Reality Beats Dreaming
by artist1157
Summary: This is Episodes 1.11- 1.20 in Patrick's POV. It's how he perceives Kat and how he feels about her, all in a nut shell.
1. Da Repercussions

**(Disclaimer: I do not own Patrick Verona, or 10 Things)**

**Hey ladies and gentleman, this Season 2, Episode 1.**

**Patrick's POV**

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* * *

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I was the one who had to help her break into school. Why, would you ask, would I help her do that? Well, it might be that I, Patrick Verona, am a little obsessed with _her_.

It all started the previous night, when I took her to the beach after she hopped onto the back of my motorcycle. I've been waiting her for to do that for a while now, and it felt as good as in my dreams. Her body pressed up against my back and her hands secured tightly around my waist.

It almost was a fantasy, having her sitting behind me on my bike. Only in my dreams did I ever think that she would knowingly get on the back of my bike and trust me enough to take her wherever I wanted. I'm sure it was no surprise to her that I would take her to the beach. The sun was setting already, being late fall. When I pulled up to the beach, she stayed on the bike until I got up first. She took off the helmet and gave it to me, like it poisonous. She wouldn't even look at me as she slowly got up. She stared out at the water and started to grin, glancing at me before unlacing her shoes and running to the beach. Laughing and screaming she threw her shoes and bag down, jumping around and throwing off her tie. I followed her, surprised by her for the second time today, as she screamed and jumped around the beach.

She ran almost all the way to the water before turning around to scream, "I can't believe I just did that! I can't believe I just walked out of school, it was so exciting!"

She paused while she ran up to me, a small smile apparent on my face. I don't think she would ever believe how beautiful and amazing she was, when she was this carefree. It made others around her feel alive.

"I wonder if Gandhi ever felt like this," she continued. "So alive, so inspired, so-"

"Hot?" I interrupted her. I just couldn't take it anymore. The tingling sensation pooling in my stomach was growing watching her jump around. I grabbed her and held her close to me, quickly planting my lips on hers. She made a small grunt, probably the start of what she was going to say. Surprising her seemed like the only way for me to ever get to kiss her.

When I did kiss her, she froze, taken by surprise. After the shock, I felt her hands on my shoulders for a minute, pulling me closer. She tasted amazing, like strawberries. Her hands moved to rest on my chest, and she pushed me away after a few seconds.

"We took a stand," she told me, breathless and smiling. I felt the grin spread on my face as well, and it hurt so much that I agreed with a grunt and smashed my lips back onto hers.

She broke away again, bouncing in my arms, "We told the establishment to stick it!"

"Yeah, yeah, we're heroes," I commented, just wanting the feel on her lips back on mine.

She broke away again after a few seconds, turning away and running towards the water.

"Let's go in!"

"Hell no." There was no way I was going in the ocean and getting sopping wet. Someone had to be the responsible one of the two of us. Right now, while Kat was acting high off of freedom, I was the only one fit for the job.

"Oh, and I thought you were a tough guy." I gave out a laugh, acknowledging that she used my own reputation against me as she spun and finally made her way into the waves, diving in and jumping around.

I plopped down on the beach by our bags, thinking how this carefree Kat was about to go _Sianara_ the minute the high passed. The fun, free girl I loved would soon go back to the hard-shelled feminist I admired.

It was no surprise that a tired, worn out Kat finally dragged herself back to the beach. She dropped herself next to me, shivering, and exclaimed,

"I'm suspended. My Dad is going to kill me!"

I had no words of comfort, but my actions always seemed to speak louder than my words. I grabbed my leather jacket, shook out the sand, and wrapped it around her. She gave me a look while I pulled her in close to me, but accepted the tight squeeze I was giving her, all in effort to show her how much I really, truly cared about her.

* * *

It was no surprise when I woke the next morning happier than I'd been in a while. Who cared if I was suspended? My mother would only give me another lecture about how I was throwing my life away and remind me that my dad would be disappointed in me. Like I honestly cared about that anymore?

I left the house in the morning and having nothing to do, I drove around the neighborhood. I found myself parked in front of _her_ house. It made me nervous to see her again because I didn't just want to see her again, I needed to see her again. I finally got myself under control, and gained the guts to open the front door. I found her painting the walls, freaking out about something when I knocked on the door.

One look from her and I knew I wouldn't be welcomed. Her words and a point of the finger weren't encouraging either, "_You_ cannot come in."

That didn't stop me though, and she continued pushing me out with her words. "If my dad sees you here, his head will explode, and then I'll have to repaint."

"Your dad's at work. How's he gonna see me, hidden cameras?" I asked, starting to add some of my famous charm to every word. I wanted to impress her and bring her closer, not repel her away from me even more.

"Yes," she looked at me, eyes wide, like the answer was the most obvious one in the world.

"Come on. I'll help you paint. It's the least I can do. After all you did get suspended for me," I joked as I turned to grab a paint can. This was the usual banter between us. One of us made a sarcastic remark, and the snowball started to roll. All of our banters usually ended the same- in one of us getting frustrated with the other. It once ended with a kiss though, which I do take credit for.

"Don't flatter yourself. I got suspended for my principals. I just fled the scene with you." It amused me how she did everything in spite of me, when she had her walls up. I couldn't resist with the next comeback though.

"Really? Because I think..." I trailed off, grabbing a paintbrush and writing _K hearts P_, underlining it.

"I'm not kidding. There're cameras around." She took the paint that she had laid out in the tray to cover up my artwork. The same artwork she had texted me when she was drunk.

"You don't get the point of being suspended at all. The day off, no school. It's like a vacation," I told her, changing the subject and painting the wall. She was standing right next to me, and I could feel the heat radiating off of her.

"This is not a vacation. After I paint this entire room, I still have to study for an English test I was supposed to take today."

"If you get suspended on a test day you get a zero. That's the rules," I almost felt like adding a_ duh_ to the end of that sentence, but I figured that since this was most likely the first time she was ever suspended, she hadn't had the break down of how it works yet.

"A zero. No," She turned to me, like I was one not understanding her, "They'll just have to make an exception."

I snorted, "I don't think they do that, not that I've ever tried."

She looked at me, and lurched forward like she was going to gag. "Oh my God."

She turned around and placed the roller on the painting tray, "Oh my God, I can't get a zero." It was amusing watching her, and I could feel the smirk on my face. I had never been close to anyone in my life who wanted to do something so badly, academically, that they would flip out over getting one zero. From this little freak out, I could see the reasons why.

"That will bring down my whole GPA, and on top of the suspension... why did I do something so stupid? I have ruined my entire life, my whole future. I won't get into Brown. I won't be able to protect civil liberties and crusade against injustice. And I can't even be a house painter because I suck at it," she plopped down on a covered armrest, completely overreacting in my opinion. I could see the gears working in her head though, turning and cranking about how wrong of a decision it was to follow me out of school yesterday.

"Don't you think your overreacting?" I asked her, trying to calm her down. She looked at me as if I might be right for a minute. She then looked at me like I was crazy when I added, "It's your first days of painting, you'll get better."

"Just kidding," I said quickly, not wanting her to get too mad at me. If she did, then I would be out of here with nothing to do for the remainder of the day. "If this test is that important, we'll just break into school and take it."

"How am I going to do that?"

"With my help," I told her, with a small smile before backing away, knowing she would soon be following.

* * *

So that is how we ended up at school, on a suspension day. She threw on a sweatshirt and sunglasses, the same ones she wore when she was drunk at her party- as a disguse.

To make things even more interesting, we were parading around like freakin' FBI agents on our first top-secret mission. I was the leader, and she was the co-agent, following my lead. As the head agent, I made sure to keep her close to me at all times, even when that was pressed up against me in a corner.

"I'm not so sure about this," she announced as I brought her up to the druggie van. "What if someone recognizes me?"

"Don't worry. With the hood and sunglasses, they'll just think you're a celebrity."

When she didn't answer, I took this as my que and knock on the door of the van. _Da-da-da-da, da-da._

I heard the van unlock, and Keith opened the door once he saw that it was me. "Hey dudes, its Patrick Verona."

He turned to his friends as they awed, "And he brought our favorite freedom fighter, the Dalai Lama."

"Really? Me, your favorite?" Kat exclaimed, and I turned to look at her with a smirk on my face, to see if she were serious. She was.

"Yeah 'cause you got the protesting back on, we got to empty out our lockers. All full and brimmin' with sweet hydro," Keith turned to his friends for high-fives as Kat said sarcastically, "That's exactly what I was fighting for, your stash."

"Uh, can you guys get in and grab a double Williams please before the big K doubles catch us."

We both climbed in, and I shut the door behind us. I turned to Keith and said, "We need passage."

"Oh," Keith said, disappointed as he grabbed his phone. "The southwest hall is clear."

"How do you know?" Kat asked, taking her glasses off.

"There's an app for that," Keith turned to Kat and showed her, proud of his new found app.

She tucked her glasses in her shirt, and followed me out of the car, waiting for me to pick the lock of the school door. Once the entering part of the mission was complete, all we needed to do was get to Kat's English classroom to so she could take the test.

I walked ahead of her down the hall, determined to complete the mission for her. It was going fine until I heard, "School police." It was my favorite person in the world, the school police, otherwise known as Jerk.

Kat grabbed my shoulder and started pulling me back, like I couldn't already hear Jerk's voice yelling down the hall. I turned to her and held up my finger, and she hit my chest. I grabbed her waist and turned her around to push her into the nearest janitors closet, where we had some unlikely visitors.

Kat gasped, when we ran into her sister, and Joey Donner.

"Your skipping class to make out with your boyfriend?" Kat accused.

"Just the last ten minutes. Besides, it's history, I know how it ends. Everyone dies," Bianca gave her sister a once over, "Aren't you supposed to be painting the living room?"

"I have to take an English test."

"You broke into school to take a test?" She waited for Kat's awkward nod of the head before saying, "You are so weird."

Joey all of a sudden reached out and grabbed my hand, "Hi, I'm Joey, Bianca's boyfriend. We should double sometime." I just looked at him, expressionless and cocked my head, wondering if he was serious or if he was just trying to get on my good side. I was amused though, at the fact that he thought Kat and I were dating.

Bianca sighed, as if this was the millionth time she was explaining something, "Joey, we're dating in secret."

"Bianca, I think they know."

It was at that moment the bell rung. Both sisters turned to each other and said, "I was never here."

There was a pause, like they were waiting for the other one to deny this proposal. When nothing was said, I cut in with, "You Stratford sisters are a strange breed." Giving Kat a look.

It was funny how true that statement was though. They both came from the same mom and dad (or so one would think) and yet they were two totally different people. They didn't look alike or act alike at all. If someone hadn't told me, I would have never pegged Bianca as Kat's sister or visa versa.

Kat decided it was time to go, so she turned to the door and opened it while pulling her hood up over her head. I followed her out the door and down to her English room, where I left, but not without saying, "Good luck."

* * *

I leaned up against the lockers, a minute before the period ended, waiting for the bell to ring so we could get out of here. I had fifty minutes to wait for her. I decided to sit in the bathroom to wait, pondering why it was that I felt compelled to do everything with her. I did almost everything for her or in spite of her. I woke up, got dressed, and made myself somewhat presentable this morning so that I could go and see her. I had a great day yesterday because she had made it one.

No matter what I did, I couldn't get her to leave my thoughts. I dreamt about her, I wrote about how much I hated her (which was such I lie because I don't think I could live a day without her), and I even talked to my cat about her. If I were anyone else but me, I would say I was going crazy. If my mother saw me like this, she would tell me I was falling for her, _Kat._

The name rolled off the tongue so easily, and her face in my mind was so crystal clear it was scary. I could see her smile and hear the carefree laugh she had given off, just hours ago. If I tried really hard I could taste her strawberry chap-stick on my lips, smell the lavender and vanilla shampoo in her hair, or feel her warmth spreading through me. I was sickly obsessed and I knew it.

* * *

She came out of the classroom looking both ways before seeing me. She had a bounce in her step and a smile on her face.

She bounced on over to me, "Academic catastrophe adverted."

We started to walk along as I smirked at her, "I took the test. Actually, I aced the test."

From down the hall we could here Jerk yell, "Incense my ass, I know my incenses..."

Kat looked down the hall and saw him, and turned to me, wide-eyed. We were in the middle of the hallway and there was nowhere to go.

She finally looked back at me, made a grunting noise, and jumped at me. Now let me tell you who was more surprised. This was third time that I had been truly surprised by Kat Stratford in the past two days. I was so surprised I barely had time to catch her as she threw herself at me. My back hit the lockers and I was thrown off balance. When I regained my positioning, I was able to put my hands at her waist to hold her against me. When she threw herself at me she had wrapped her arms around my neck to keep herself pressed against me and still be able to reach my lips.

The kiss was simple and sweet, and when she couldn't hear Jerk anymore she pulled away, a smile on her face and a smirk on mine. She looked away quickly, wiping the smile off.

"You've been wanted to do that all day." _And so have I_, I wanted to add. I knew if I did, I would have her running for good, and that was something neither of us wanted.

"Hah, let's get out of here," she took my arm and bent it, so her hand was resting in the crock of my arm and she could drag me with her. "I still have to finish painting the living room before my dad gets home."

I looked both ways down the hall. On a whim, I grabbed her waist and spun her around so fast she didn't have time to fully react when I said, "Shh, someone's coming."

I bent down to kiss her, but by now she noticed that no one was coming. "Oh, shut up. Let's go." I smiled at her, and she smiled back good naturedly as I walked ahead of her into the hallway, waiting for her to put up her hood.

I froze, when I heard Jerk yell, "Hey you. Motorcycle man. You shouldn't be in here."

I quickly looked at Kat and said, "Today was fun," before turning and leaving her in my wake, running the other way.

* * *

After a while, running from the law can get tiring. I honestly can say that I never had actually been arrested before. I had gotten a speeding ticket, and been dragged out of a school dance, thanks to Keith, but beside that, I really haven't been able to say I'm good friends with the police force. I tend to stay my distance, and they stay theirs.

I always thought it was amusing that people thought I was a criminal, just like they thought my mom was a Mexican Drug Whore. My mother was not Mexican, has never done any drugs (except drink alcohol), and married her first boyfriend ever, my father- and had me. I was always pegged with these crazy weird rumors, none of which were true. Not that I cared, you learn not to. It did get annoying though, being sent to Holland's office every other day for stuff I didn't even know anything about.

But when Jerk backed me into a corner, cuffed me, and was taking me to the office, I knew that there would be rumors spreading tomorrow about how Patrick Verona broke into school to collect his dead bodies.

I wasn't too happy to be brought into Holland's office. I couldn't wait to hear the same speech that she hd given me a hundred times before, "This will go on your permanent record and you will never make anything of yourself, blah, blah, blah."

As the Jerk and I got closer, I could here a male voice yelling at Holland. A male voice that was insanely familiar- Kat's father's. This, of all things caused my face to go blank and etch with the deepest form of apology I could muster. This means that Kat is probably in there too, for Holland wouldn't just call Kat's father in for a chat without a good reason. I was not good at saying sorry, but I did everything I could to try to make the message I was trying to convey known to Kat when she saw my face.

"I got the other one. Man he's fast," Jerk said as he pushed me into Holland's office.

"Well, well, well, if isn't it that poor kid now. That poor, defenseless kid," Holland said, pleased that I was apart of this.

I stared at Kat, trying to get my message across, but she only glanced at me for a second before looking away and staring at her hands.

* * *

Well you could say that in the end, Walter saved my butt. Holland ended up lifting the suspension for both of us, and nothing about today went on our permanent records. I knew that she wasn't too thrilled about it, but I think that she can handle defeat every now and then. I made sure to whisper goodbye to Kat, not knowing if I was going to see her tomorrow at school.

I got home, and my mother was waiting in the kitchen, angry as ever that I hadn't been home all day or hadn't answered my cell phone. I waited through the yelling, and apologized when she was done. I gave her no explanation about where I was today before I walked upstairs, with her yelling, "You're now grounded for two months!" after me.

I dropped onto my bed, ready to fall asleep and wait for tomorrow. I was exhausted and I would bet you that tonight, I won't be able to fall asleep. Partly because I would be dreaming of her, and partly because I would be arguing with Dr. Seuss in the back of my mind...

"_You know you're in love when you can't fall asleep because reality is finally better than your dreams."_

_

* * *

_**Please comment and tell me whether you like or hate it. I haven't decided if I want to write the rest of the season from Patrick's POV, since I haven't seen it yet. I will probably wait a while to write up the other episodes anyway, so if we learn anymore information about Patrick I can use it when I write the next one. **


	2. Don't Trust Me

Mornings always went the same in my house. Force self out of bed, brush teeth, get dressed, eat something, go to school.

Step one was to force self out of bed. I usually had to think of at least one good reason to go to school so that I would get up. The thing that I usually thought about was the fact that my mother would kill me if I didn't go to school. I normally wouldn't care, but right now I didn't want to be grounded anymore than I already was. It was cheesy to say that I was afraid of my mother, but sometimes, she could be terrifying. Like when she's mad.

But today, things were a little different. I had another reason on my list to get up, and that was a luscious, fiery little brunette.

She was luscious, fiery, and more. She was intelligent, witty, independent, and beautiful. She wasn't waiting around for her prince charming, but I have a feeling that when she finds him she'll know.

_I always thought that I meet her by accident_, I was thinking to myself as I completed step one and moved onto step two. She was a pain in the ass at first because in a way, she was just like me. An outsider. Someone who didn't want anything to do with the "mindless mouth- breathers of Padua High."

That is why I first found her interesting. As I got to know her better, as I fell for her, it seemed like she hated me. In the beginning I wondered why I cared so much. It was just a girl, and she kept giving me such a hard time. Sleepless nights, injuries, and detention were just some of the few things that she has graced me with. Then on the rooftop, I finally just got over the nerves and kissed her. It was not easy for me because she was not easy, and I didn't want to repel her away.

* * *

School was boring as usual. Today was a better day in a sense that I didn't get sent to the office, but was worse in a sense that I didn't get to see Kat. Well, I did see her today, but never got the chance to go up to talk to her.

I wanted to ask her what she was up to, when I saw her get off the bus this morning, and then later on when I saw her with the giant- Cameron, talking on the balcony. I didn't know what they were talking about, but I was sure I didn't have to worry about Carmon falling for Kat, he is too scared of her.

Finally, at the end of the day I got a text from her. _Meet me outside, I have something stupid to ask you._

That, made me nervous. Kat usually isn't a round-a-about girl, she is straight to the point. Her not getting strait to the point means that she is either nervous or embarrassed at what she is going to ask.

So I waited outside. I saw her talking to her large best friend, nodding her head at whatever she was talking about.

I walked up and tapped her on the shoulder, "Hey."

She turned to friend, "I just need two seconds."

"It's fine, I got to go anyway." The friend smiled at Kat, and glanced at me before turning and running the other way.

"Call you later," Kat said as her friend walked away.

I waited for Kat to turn around before saying, "I just got your text, what's the stupid thing you want to ask me?"

"Okay, you know how my dad is insane?" Yes, I wanted to say, I do know how he is insane. Instead I said, "He made me watch a slideshow of some chick giving birth, so yeah."

"Well, now he wants you to come to dinner." Those words coming out of _her _mouth almost made me stop and think about the answer that came out of my mouth. _Almost._

"I'll pass."

"I told you it was stupid, but he's afraid you're a bad influence on me."

"Huh," I reached up and pushed a strand of hair out of her face, my fingers trailing along her jaw. "I wonder why?"

She smiled shyly at me, and I felt my stomach curl at the thought that I had that affect on her, fulling knowing that if she played me right, I would be the one eating out of the palm of her hand.

"Look, if you don't come over, he says we can't hang out." I wanted to laugh at that. Was she really that dense?

"He never has to know, this is really like High School 101," I told her, like it was obvious that he doesn't have to know everything about us.

"But my Dad doesn't trust me anymore, and I'm not going to lie to him again. It's jut lasagna, in or out," she said, her voice annoyed but her big doe-eyes working their magic. I couldn't say yes to this. It would be breaking every moral code I had left. I had already broken all the others ones when I fell for Kat, and now I would be "getting involved in a relationship", and I didn't know if I wanted that.

Finally, I looked at her. My face stone and my voice expressionless, "I don't do family dinners."

"So that's your answer," she said, her face a mask but her eyes portrayed hurt.

"Yep."

"Fine." She looked at me and raised her eyebrows, "See you around."

With that she turned from me and got onto the bus. I stood there for a minute in shock, before calmly walking away to get on my bike.

I knew she was mad at me, for turning down the offer to dinner but I just couldn't do it. I was not as strong as she thought I was. I was weak and vulnerable in so many places, commitment being one of them. It was true though, I was scared of a commitment. I've never really made any commitments to a girl before, and the one time I did you could say that I was hurt enough to not even look at girls for a while.

So, you could also say that I was scared of getting hurt. Her father didn't particular like me. I knew it, she knew it, and her father knew it. Why not just leave it at that?

But being Kat, she couldn't just leave it at that. She had to come up to me at school the next day, smiling. I was taken aback by the fact that she was smiling at me, when she had pretty much said that she never wanted to see me again the other day.

"I want you to help me punk my dad."

I looked at her, like she was crazy. I was sitting outside the cafeteria, on a ledge were no one would be able to see me. Of course it was Kat that found me, and it was Kat who sat down next to me.

"You're daddy's little girl, why would you ever do that?" I asked. The question came out more bitter that I had intended it too, but that didn't faze her.

"I'm tired of him thinking I'm his little girl and that he can use me as a puppet. I want to be treated with dignity and respect by my own father. As a young women I deserve that right," she huffed. I liked her like this. Heated up, excited about something she cared about. It made her eyes gleam in a way that other peoples don't, and you could tell with just that gleam that she really cared about what she was doing.

"Your so _hot_ when you act like that." I heard myself say. I felt myself blush a little and covered up the slip by lifting my hand up to brush a piece of hair that recently fallen into her face away.

"Excuse me?" She looked at me like I was the one who was going crazy.

"You heard me, or do you need a hearing aid?" I asked her with a smirk.

"No, never mind. Look are you in this or not?" She had a way of getting what she wanted, no matter what the circumstances were. I never understood why until now. When she knew how to get you to side with her, she used every weapon in the book to make sure you were tightly bound and weren't going to back out on her.

"Sure, all come over," I finally said, sighing.

She smiled at me, and I felt my stomach tingle a little.

"On one condition," I added in quickly.

Her smile dropped from her face, and she sighed before she said, "What is it?"

I leaned forward to whisper in her ear, "I expect that you cook me some ham _sweetheart_."

I leaned back to see the look of disgust on her face, "Sure, whatever you want."

"Great," I smiled at her, kissed her on the cheek before getting up and walking to my next class as the bell rang.

She stood there for a moment, looking after me before yelling, "I'll call you later!"

* * *

Call me later she did. The minute she got home she started to marinate the ham, she informed me, seeing as she didn't know how long it was going to take to cook it since she is a vegetarian.

We talked about how we were going to prank Walter at dinner. We both decided the lovey-dovey thing was perfect. It was over the top and we would definatly make him squirm.

I drove over around seven, just like she instructed me. I got up off my bike and knocked on the back door. Walter opened it, and was greeted by my smiling face.

"Hey Dr. Stratford," I said pleasantly as I shoved my motorcycle helmet into his stomach.

"Hey babe," I told Kat, walking over to her. "Mmm, I smell ham."

She looked cute in her little apron, and she giggled when I wrapped my arms around her waist to kiss her.

Dr. Stratford wasn't looking to great, and I smiled at Kat when I bent down to whisper to her, "Don't you look sexy in an apron."

She let out a small laugh and said nothing, and I smiled wider because I knew if her father wasn't there and we weren't pulling this prank, she would be going off on me about feminist rights.

The food didn't take long to cook, and we were sitting at the dinner table across from her dad. Our hands where intertwined and she was giggling like the good little actress she was. I was playing my part and fed her some rice.

Her father looked at us and said, "Okay, enough of that. I have a fork and I'm not afraid to use it."

We glanced at each other and let our hands drop from the table and into our own laps. I hated how this was only play, and how in reality, Kat would never actually hold my hand like that.

"So Patrick, tell me about your family," Walter said, trying to start a conversation.

"Well my dad's a tattoo artist." Lifting up my fork for extra emphasis I added, "In fact, when he gets out of debt he wants to open his own shop. He's kind of a dreamer."

"Oh, I see." Walter moved his food around in his plate for a second, "And does your mom work?"

"Yes sir." I paused, trying to think of something to say that would wind him up a little bit. "Well, I guess you could call her a dancer."

Walter dropped his fork and knife to cover his eyes with his hand.

"Honey, broccoli?" Kat asked, trying to divert the subject.

"Nah, I don't eat anything green."

"Right," she said, giving me a little smirk.

"So what are you interested in studying at school?" Walter asked, after taking a sip of water.

"Well, I've always wanted to be an astronaut," I said, and I felt like a two year old by saying so.

Walter looked at me, impressed, despite my thoughts. "An astronaut, really? I hope your working hard at science and math."

"Mm, well my back up plan is to bum around Europe." Walter's expression fell from his face, and didn't change when his daughter excitedly added, "How fun would that be?"

"Not as much fun as college."

"But dad, I could defer for a year. Get a little bit of life experience under my belt," she sounded as if she had planned this out already, and was ready to make an argument right then and there against her father.

"Nothing goes under your belt," Walter announced quickly as he wiped his mouth. Kat turned to me sighed under her breath.

"We'll talk about this later," Walter added.

I put my elbows up on the table, something my mother had taught me to never do, and asked, "Dr. Stratford, can I ask you something?"

"Sure."

"You're a guy, no? What's up with that?"

"What do you mean?" He said, leaning back in his chair, suspicious.

"I mean, isn't it weird." I could feel Kat's steady gaze on me, and even though my question was something I was sure would make her father burst, I didn't want to let her down.

"Like, do you ever walk into one of your patients at the market and think, _Ooo..._?"

"That's it. It's not wired, and I can't believe you've asked me that at the dinner table. Not only are you nowhere near qualified to be an astronaut; you are nowhere near qualified to see my daughter. Get out." He pointed a finger at the door, standing now, his face red.

When no one moved he screamed, "Get out!"

Kat and I just couldn't take it any longer. We both started to crack up laughing, and even though her father was trying to chase me out of the house, it still made me happy to hear her laughter ringing throughout the room.

"What's so funny?" Walter asked, still yelling.

"Dad, we made all of that up. You've been punked," Kat said, simply, with her laughter still ringing in her voice.

Walter stood there for a minute, silent, before shaking his head and walking out of the room.

"That went well," I stated, turning back to my food.

"He deserved that," she said. It sounded like she was convincing herself more than telling me that.

She turned to me suddenly, "Was it true, what you said about you're parents?"

I looked at her, and flatly told her, "Just one of them."

She opened her mouth to say something, but decided against it as she watched me pick up my ham and eat it.

When I was done and had helped her clean up, she walked me to the door, holding my motorcycle helmet as she watched me put my jacket on.

I went to take it from her but she moved away. "Thank you," she said softly, looking at me with her brown eyes. It was hard to resist her when she was like this, so I bent down to kiss her softly before saying, "Anytime Stratford, anytime."

We smiled at each other and she gave me my helmet before shoving me towards the door, and locking it when I left.

* * *

The next day, I decided it would most likely be wise to check on Kat, in order to make sure was okay. I mean, she pretty much destroyed her father, and even though I knew there was self-pride in doing it, I also know that she hurt herself too.

I was in study hall and my teacher fell asleep five minutes into class, so that meant I could leave and come back unnoticed.

I found her where I thought I would, at the yearbook photo shoot. She was the "Year Book Photo Editor", trying to be "well-rounded" like the rest of us. Mr. and Miss Dependable were up, and Kat was about to take their picture when I walked up to her, put my hand on her back and said, "I smell ham." She froze, handed the camera to a boy in a sweater-vest, and turned to talk to me.

"Hey, just wanted to make sure your Dad didn't lock you in the basement," I said lazily. I didn't want her to think that I cared about her too much, and this was the easiest way of saying _I care about you enough to make my excuse for wanting to see you be that I care about you, but when in reality I'm trying to mask my feelings for you_.

She smiled at me, "Luckily, we don't have one. But it's still kind of tense."

"You know, I think it's cool how upset he gets about you. It shows how much he cares," I told her, smiling back.

Just then, Sweater-vest interrupted our conversation. "Guess what? Congratulations, you guys have been named cutest couple. People love their Katrick."

"No," we both said at the same time- our voices cold and stone. There was no way I was letting Sweater-vest name us _Cutest Couple_. And _Katrick_, what was that anyway? I cared about Kat very much, but neither of us had even thought or said anything to the other about actually dating. Our relationship was give-and-take, whatever goes. We were never an established couple, and I wasn't about to let some kid a stupid sweater-vest tell me otherwise.


	3. Great Expectations

Walking out of school on a Friday is always refreshing. It is like, _ya freedom for two whole days, suck it!_ You could do what you wanted to, and you didn't have to show up to the hell-whole they call "school".

Seeing waving brown hair out of the corner of my eye, I turned around and caught up with Kat. She acknowledged me with a nod while I said, "Thank God it's Friday."

"Or, if you're an Atheist, thank the spinning rotation of the earth." Always the sarcastic remarks that had to come pouring out of her mouth. There was nothing less and nothing more than I expected.

"I'm sorry. Did I offend you, again?" I asked, knowing that I didn't.

"It's all right I'm used to it. Don't get me started on the pledge of allegiance." I let out a short laugh. It amazed me how there was always something that she had to fix, even if it was the slightest detail.

"Big plans this weekend?" I asked lazily, like it was just one other question. I wasn't silently praying to myself that she were free. I wasn't doing that, nope, not at all.

"I think I'll check out this new documentary on the private life of plants. Sounds kid of scandalous."

I looked at her with my eyebrows raised as I got into my bike, "Your one weird chick."

I paused before saying, "Have an educational weekend."

She turned to leave, and I knew I was letting my chance slip away. I causally added, "Maybe we could hangout."

She stopped and turned around, a small smirk on her face. "Well I am really busy, so maybe if you want to hang out we should set a time."

I became nervous all of the sudden, and couldn't look her in the eye when I asked, "Are you asking me on a date?"

"I'm just saying, maybe if you give me a time frame I can fit you in," I could hear the smile in her voice, and the stubbornness to not admit to anything.

"How about tonight?" I asked. Mom is working a double shift at the hospital, so she won't be home until early tomorrow morning. That way I could hangout with Kat and come back before she came home. I was supposed to be grounded.

"A more specific time frame."

"Will seven work or will we be watching a plant movie," I finally looked up to see a pleased expression on her face, a small smile apparent.

"Seven fine, it's a deal."

I put on my helmet and started the motorcycle. I revved it up and took off, thinking were the hell I was supposed to take Kat tonight on our "hangout".

_It's a date, _my inner self screamed.

I know she would never admit that it was one and neither would I, but that fact that I was going on a date with Kat Stratford made me nervous as hell, happy as hell, and scared as hell. Not that I was going to let any of those emotions shine through when I'm with her. I mean, I was happy because it was _Kat_. Any guy would be luck to have gotten the chance to be with her, and she had chosen me. I was nervous because I never had really been committed to a relationship, and I was scared that would screw it up somehow and get hurt all over again.

_I sound like a teenage girl_, I thought to myself. I did and I know I did. I couldn't help but be a pessimist about this whole thing.

When I got home I took off my shoes, running to the shower. I always wondered why appearances where everything. Usually I only cared about maintaining my bad-boy image. Tonight, I was doing that, and trying to impress Kat to the extent to make it look like I wasn't trying. That was a lot easier said than done. It was only six and I was ready to go. I wanted to just get this over with. The more I thought about it the more I wanted to back out. This wasn't me though. Why was I acting like such a wuss? It was pathetic. I finally went to my room to grab my stash of money. I was saving it up to buy my mom a new watch for her birthday, but I could always just work a couple extra shifts at the shop to make up for the spent money. Besides, Kat deserves this.

I drove over to her house, walking up to the door, hand in the air when the door opened and Bianca and Joey walked out the door.

"Hey Patrick," Bianca said smoothly, "Have fun on your date or whatever."

_Date_. Is that what everyone thought this was. I had finally resulted in thinking that this was just a hangout, and she had to remind me? I smiled sarcastically and nodded as they passed.

Now I had to face her father, "Hello son." He waved his hand at me to come in.

I stood there for a moment, before asking, "If I come in, do I have to watch the slideshow again?"

"Yes, but we'll go through it faster," Walter smiled before waving me inside again. I nodded my head expectedly and closed the door when I went inside.

It didn't take long before Kat came down-stairs. She was wearing her hair back and had on a pair of formfitting jeans, _hot_. She saved me from the slideshow, seeing as we only got to the second slide when she came down. She kissed her dad on the check and rushed me out of the house before her father could get another word in.

We jumped into the car, her in the driver seat. "Were should we go on tonight's adventure?"

I buckled my seat belt and looked at her as if she were serious, "I don't care, I figured you'd have a plan."

She turned to face me, "Well, I'm hungry, let's go eat."

"Cool," I said scratching my nose nervously. "How's Hal's Steak House, I'm dying for a rib-bi."

She gave me a sour look, "You know I don't eat anything with a face."

I shrugged, kill me for forgetting, "They usually cut that part off before they serve it to you."

"You don't say," she reached forward to put the keys in the ignition. "How about Vegan Nirvana?"

"No thanks. I'll just save a tree while saving twenty bucks." It was true, though. I was a man and I needed my meat. This was one thing that I was going to have to disagree on.

"You know what, I'll just drive, we'll find something," she said, annoyed, as she started the car and pulled away before I could say anything else.

* * *

"Finally, I'm starving," she told me, picking up a chip from a bowl in the middle of the table.

"We would have been eating an hour ago, if you ate fish." It was true. We were going up and down the block for over an hour, bickering over were to eat. We each had our own reasons not to eat at each restaurant, and finally decided on this one, where neither of us knew what was on the menu.

She glared at me for a minute before saying, "Nothing with a face."

We picked up our menus and looked for a minute. I was trying to read the fancy names for everything, until Kat added, "This place is expensive."

I looked at her, remembering how it took us over an hour to compromise on this restaurant, "We're not going anywhere else."

The waiter came up to the table, and in one breath he said, "Hi my name is Winston, I'll be your waiter. May I take your order?"

Kat pointed to her menu while swallowing her bite, "Actually, we haven't finished-"

"Look, in forty-five minutes I got to kick you out of this table. We got some VIPs coming in, so more time with the menu, less time eating," he sang the last couple words, and I looked at Kat, an _are-you-kidding-me_ expression plastered on my face. When she returned the look with a shrug I looked down at the menu and asked for the first thing I saw.

"I'll have the chicken."

"The passion-fruit prescaut, or the adbacadas fracasssi?"

"The first one?" I said, a questioning ring to my voice, not knowing what the heck he just asked.

"And for the lady?"

"I'll just have the side salad," Kat said, pausing, "And please don't call me a lady."

"And for your entrée?"

"That is my entrée," she replied, annoyed as she put the menu down in front of her.

"Look, I'm just letting you know that our side salads are _side salads_, they're quite small. That's why they call them side salads," Winston said rudely, and I was really wanting to slap him.

I looked at Kat, expression laid back, "Get whatever you want, I got it."

She looked at me, surprised, "You sure?"

I nodded my head coolly, "Don't worry about it."

Kat smirked to herself, and picked the menu back up. "I'll have the ginger-chipoltley tofu. But without the chipotley."

Winston looked at Kat, and raised his brow, "Okay just so you know, that's not how the award winning chief designed it."

Kat smirked at him, clearly trying to pose a fake smile.

"And for your water, sparkling or still?" Winston added quickly.

She glanced at me at the same time a glanced at her, us both saying, "Tap," at the same time.

"Of course."

When Winston walked away, I turned to her and mocked, _Of course_ to her.

She gave me a look as Winston came to bring back our water. I picked it up to take a sip.

"No, actually, I'd like sewer water please," she stated, moving her glass around in her hand, causing me to choke on some water while laughing.

I smiled at her while I wiped myself off and pointed a finger while saying; "I'm going to get you for that."

She laughed quietly as a turned to wipe the water off my lap. She took her long, wavy, dark, silky hair down and fluffed it out. I smiled at her when I looked up, thinking how I preferred it down so much more than up. I don't know how many times I had to slap myself, knowing of the thoughts I have had- running my fingers through her hair, just imagining what it would feel like.

She laughed quietly and smiled.

* * *

It didn't take the food long to come, and when it did we were to engrossed in out food to start up a conversation. We finished, and started the conservation on music, something that we both had in common.

"I know the drummer from Morgred Beaters," I informed her, smiling at her laugh.

She looked at me doubtfully, "Shut up. How?"

"This guy I know met him in rehab." Which wasn't a total lie, it just so happened that this guy I know wasn't _in_ rehab, but worked at the center the drummer was at.

She looked at me, an unbelieving look on her face, "This guy I know, was it you?"

I looked at her dead on, my face serious, "You got me, I'm a sex addict."

She laughed again and my stomach couldn't help but curl a little, "Oh my god. I knew I recognized you from group. You were the guy wearing the hoodie."

"You should have seen what I was wearing underneath," I stated. She looked at me expectantly, then made a face and hit me with her napkin when I whispered, "Nothing."

"If you hand me your card now it would save time," Winston said, appearing out of nowhere. I was a little peeved at his timing, always interrupting us as the dispute got good.

I held my hand out, "I would like to review the check first."

I took the check and looked at it, already knowing that I would never be able to pay for the meal.

"Thanks Patrick, I'll totally get the next one," she said unexpectedly, a grateful look in her eyes.

"Cool," I said, placing the check down. I already knew where the nearest exit was. I had scooped it out when she had left to go to the bathroom.

"But this time," I started, moving in closer. Her eyes got wide for a minute, and got even wider when I said, "Run."

I got up out of my chair and turned, but she was not following me. She was staring at the table, her hands out in front of her, fuming.

"Come on," I turned around quickly and grabbed her coat and her arm, dragging her to the nearest exit as the fire alarm rang.

I would hear about this on the drive home, but right now, we needed to get out of there.

We ran out to the car, sprinting as she tried to look where she was going and figure out which pocket she had shoved her car keys in. It was exciting to do this again, something I haven't done in a long time. Just like I had suspected though, the minute we were far enough away from the restaurant, she pulled over and stopped the car.

She turned to me right away, "I can't believe you did that. What were you thinking? We have to go back and pay that bill."

She was going to say more but let out a small burp.

"Well, excuse you," I said, letting out a chuckle.

"This is not funny. That was wrong."

"What's wrong are those prices. Who pays that much?" Honestly though, the price for one meal was more than I make in a month, and there was no way that I could afford paying for that, even with the money that I had brought.

"All the other people in the restaurant!" She brought her hand up to burp again.

"Lighten up. What's the big deal, the waiter was a jerk," I said, smirking at her.

She turned to me again, "The big deal, is that I don't want to commit a crime on our first date."

A sickening feeling washed over me, "Oh, I didn't realize this was a _date_."

"Neither did I, until you offered to pay," she said, clearly exasperated.

"Ah, but I didn't pay," I told her, as if it was obvious, 'cause it was.

"Ah, yes, I remember," she settled back into her seat, looking a little pale. "Fine this isn't a date."

"What's your problem, I thought you were cool with this." _I am_, I almost added. This is why I decided to come tonight. I thought she knew that there wasn't an actually relationship involved with this, that this was a hangout. Neither of us was they _dating_ type, and I thought that she was repulsed at the idea of going out with me. Obviously this was not true, since she is here right now, calling our hangout a date.

"With what? Going on dates and not calling them dates? What's so terrible about a date?" She asked quickly. She was holding her stomach and rocking back and forth, her face even paler now.

I heard her words and became upset. If I had known that she wanted a commitment, then I wouldn't have gotten myself tangle in her web. I knew I was falling for her, but I didn't want a relationship. I didn't think I was ready for one yet, right?

"Because a date comes with all these expectations," I said, my frustration leaking into my voice, and everything I was just thinking threatened to come pouring out as she burped again and pressed her hand into her chest. "On me. And I didn't sign up for-"

I stopped for a minute, as she turned her head out the window and hurled. I looked at her for a minute, my previous thoughts banished from my mind, and asked, "Are you okay?"

She brought herself back up and wiped her mouth off with the back of her hand. She looked at me with tired eyes and said softly, "What do you think?"

I took a look at her. Her pale, sickly complexion was surprising to me. I raised my hand to her forehead, just like I had seen my mother do to me when I threw up. She felt a little clammy.

"No."

"Ding, ding, ding, we have a winner," she said softly, no enthusiasm in her voice.

I sighed, "Come on, there is no way you are driving home."

After getting her into the passenger seat safely, I made sure she was settled before starting off to her house.

It was quiet in the car, Kat leaning back against the seat, eyes shut. Her face was pale and placid. There was no way she would be doing any talking. This gave me time to think.

_A date_. She thought we were going on a date, and wanted to. She wasn't as repulsed by me as it seemed. I wasn't sure if I was ready for a commitment yet. We were at a stoplight and I looked at Kat's sleeping face, thinking about how she had made her choice, and I hadn't really made mine. She was fine with me, and I was fine with her. We really knew nothing about each other, and I did want to get to know her better, and get inside of her walls.

I already knew and accepted that I cared about more than I normally let myself care for anyone, and I knew that I had broken my rules and had fallen for her. There was no one to catch me except for her, and I wasn't sure how great of a job she was doing.

When I came to complete stop and turned off the car in front of her house, I made sure to walk around to the passenger side before poking her a couple time to get her up. She roused from her sleep and looked at me with tired eyes, orienting herself for a minute.

"Hey Patrick," she murmured, holding her head and tousling her hair as she woke up.

"Come on," I said quietly.

She got out of the car and stumbled around a bit, before falling into me. I held her arms steady and brought her to the back of the house.

"Are you okay?"

"I'm never eating tofu again," she got out, leaning against the wall.

"Promise?" I asked her, and continued on to a different subject when she gave me a look.

"Hey, look on the bright side. At least our first date was memorable." I couldn't look at her as I let those words come out of my mouth, so I looked at the door, knocking on it lightly.

I turned back to her to say, "But I'm not giving you a good night kiss. Your breath is seriously nasty."

She closed her eyes and turned away from me to groan. Her father came out at that exact moment.

"What's wrong with her?" He looked at me, accusingly, "Is she drunk?"

"No, food poisoning," I moved away from Kat and Walter, as Walter felt his daughter's forehead and held onto her arm.

"Okay," Walter said, gentler than I have ever heard him, "Come on inside and we'll get you some Gatorade. Maybe pump your stomach, huh?"

Kat shook her head, and I held up the keys to her car. Her father nodded at me before snatching them away and turning inside.

Kat raised her eyebrows at me and I watched her go. She turned at the last minute around and held onto the corner of the house.

"Patrick, about the check-"

"Oh my God are you kidding me? I'll take care of it, somehow," I told her, just wanting her to leave me alone about the stupid check.

She looked at me before shaking her head and saying, "Do not pay for the tofu."

I stood there for a minute in silence and waited for her to turn around and shut the door. I backed away and watch the girl I had fallen for half-heartedly bicker with her father through the window, wondering how I got lucky enough to meet a girl like her. I stood there a moment, lingering, before shaking my head, turning around, and leaving for the long drive home.

_She is one amazing little thing._


	4. Meat is Murder

**Sorry this is so short, but Patrick really isn't in this episode that much. I hope you enjoy, and please remember to comment!**

**

* * *

**

Lunch. The perfect time to take a break from the hell-hole they call school. Usually, lunch is just another stupid period that I have to suffer through. Now, it is my social hour. I know it sounds girly, and you're thinking, _OMG! He's gossiping with his BBF!_

Ha, right. I don't think the person I have in mind would gossip with me, even if I wanted to. You see, Kat Stratford is kinda amazing like that. She usually doesn't let others influence her, or the plans she has. So when lunch comes and I get to talk to her, actually sit down and banter with her, I actually get excited.

I know, I know, alert the media. Patrick Verona, the bad-boy of Padua High, is excited for more school, so he can see her, his... friend, girlfriend, acquaintance?

That is one thing that I hate about the relationship between Kat and myself. We are both independent and headstrong, and you would think that there would be no way that we would ever come together, right? Wrong. We have "come together", meaning that we were acquaintances, then friends, and then we made out a couple times and then the road stopped. Neither of us knew what the other one was thinking. Neither of knew if the one even like the other _that way_. It was pathetic really, but I liked what we had, and I wasn't willing to risk losing her trust again by trying to establish something between us. For now, just having her in my life is good enough for me.

The bell finally rang and off to lunch I went. I bought a cheeseburger and some fries. I looked around for Kat, and found her reading a book and twirling her fork in her hand. I plopped my tray down next to Kat's, sitting down while trying to read what the name of her book is.

"Meat is Not Green, huh?" I looked down to pick up my burger, "If it is, you probably shouldn't eat it."

She looked up at me, a smirk on her face, "Don't mock. This book is fascinating. Like did you know that eighteen percent of the worlds greenhouse gas emissions come from animal agriculture."

I took I bite of my burger and said, "That is fascinating."

I could see the spark in her eyes, and I new that this was already something that was set in stone in her mind. "If everyone at this school ate vegetables instead of processed animal flesh just one day a week it would make a huge environmental impact."

"Huh. What else can I do, is there like, a walkathon or something?" I said, chewing still.

"No," she said, a small smile apparent on her face, "If you don't want to do it for the earth, do it for your colon."

I made a disgusted face at her, "Come on, I'm eating."

"I can see that," she replied, glancing down at my tray in disgust as well, "Vividly."

"Ha," I told her, mouth full. She snorted at me as she packed her bag.

"Okay, recess is over. Enjoy your carbon footprint, I'm going to go do something about this." She got up and walked away, looking like she was going into battle.

"Of course you are," I called after her, "You still want to hang out after school."

She paused for a minute calling back, "Sure."

I smiled, and went back to my food. I would hear more about this from her after-school.

* * *

Handling Kat Stratford is not an easy thing to do. It is a hard, grueling task, especially when she is talking about her causes. It's not like I don't care about the world, I do. I just don't care as much as Kat does. Even the littlest thing can be changed, according to her, and she is always ready to go off into battle and fight for what she believes in. I just don't want to be caught up in all of that. I don't want the attention, and I don't need it. I want to be left alone in my little world, with her being one of the few select people that I hangout with.

So, lying on her bed trying watching her pace around the room my not be the best way to pay attention to what she was saying. Watching her like this is always so fascinating. The spark in her eyes, the constant movement of her hands, the way her lips move to form words that some politicians would be impressed to find in a seventeen-year-old girls vocabulary. This was one of the times I loved watching her, the other when when she is carefree and wild- like at the beach. When she is like that you truly never know what she is going to say or do, and it's usually something that she later regrets.

She would look at me every now and then, and I would just nod my head and smirk at her. I don't think she has realized that I've stopped listening to her five minutes ago, when we first walked into the house. Her bed was not helping my concentration either. It was incredibly soft, and it smelled just like her. You could say that I'm a little obsessed with her, and I would have to agree.

I looked at the clock, realizing it was already four-thirty. If I wasn't home before my mom, I would be a dead man.

I got off the bed and she stopped talking, and the room became unnaturally silent for a moment.

"I got to go," I told her, face placid.

Her breathing was labored, her chest rising and falling as if she had just run a marathon. "Okay," she said slowly, as if not sure if I was really going.

I walked over to her desk to pick up my stuff and shove it in my bag before giving her a kiss on the forehead and leaving, with her calling after me, "See you tomorrow!"

* * *

The next day at school, I went a whole day without seeing Kat. I didn't see her at lunch, and I realized that she probably went to the student council meeting that they have weekly. I had to wait until the end of the day to see her.

I spotted her after-school, talking to _him_. I didn't even know _his_ name, but _he_ was definitely flirting with her, Kat. I put my hands in my pocket and slowly walked over there, and I was sure as hell trying to stay calm. I didn't know _him_ and didn't want to, but _he_ was messing around with Kat, and I got a bad taste in my mouth just watching their exchange.

She was writing down her number and giving it to him as I was approaching, and I looked around to make sure that this wasn't some type of joke. I mean, come on. They guy was eyeing her like a prize, and she couldn't even see it.

Calmly I approached her and took _his_ seat as _he_ got up.

"Who's that guy?" I asked, as calmly as I could.

"His name is Blank," she stated, mind somewhere else for a minute.

"Blank," the name rolled off my tongue, and I felt disgusted. "He sounds like a douche."

"Please don't use that word. It's loaded with gender bias."

"I know," I leaned forward, smiling. "That's why I like it."

She looked at me through her shades, smirking and shaking her head.

The bus driver honked his horn, signaling his departure.

"I gotta go," she said, collecting her things.

"See you tomorrow," I replied, but she was already gone.

* * *

I shouldn't feel this way about a guy that I haven't even met, but I will admit it, I hate him already. The Douche. I hate his hair, his clothes, his stupid British accent, and the fact that he is getting together with Kat to work on _Meatless Monday_. I know that Kat is an activist and wants to change every little thing wrong with the world, and is willing to go almost any length to do so, but with _him. Really?_ I felt like gagging every time I looked at his pretty-little- stuck-up-doosh-face.

I lay spread-eagle on my bed late that night, trying to go to sleep. I was staring at the ceiling, trying to figure out why I hated this guy so much. I didn't know why I feel so, well, _protective_ of Kat. I didn't want Kat to be near other guys that could harm her. I didn't want to see her get hurt, and I had a strong feeling that _he_ would hurt her.

* * *

Lunch, again. But this time I spent it glaring at Kat and Douche, wondering why I wasn't good enough for her. Why as he better than me? What did he have that I didn't? I was with Kat first and I wanted to march down there and shake some sense into her. I watched her talk to him, her hands animated as she threw her head back and laughed. The sence made me want to puke.

I couldn't take it anymore, so I turned and walked away, wondering why I kept feeling like this.

_Someone's jealous_.

Jealous. I was not jealous. I just wanted Douche to know that Kat is _mine_. I was with her first and claimed her first. I knew that she wasn't a piece of meat, but in the world of men, women and meat are essential. They both make us happy. Kat made me happier than most meat, and she gave me so many other things that an inanimate object would, but _he_ had to know that she was taken and that there is no way in hell I would be giving her up without I fight. I didn't work so hard to get her just so that she could be swiped from underneath me. No matter how much it pains for me to admit this, I've started to realize how much seeing her energizes me and helps me get through the day. I needed her, but by seeing this (her and Douche laughing it off) I'm pretty sure that she's trying to tell me she doesn't need me- at least not as much as I need her.

* * *

I caught up with her at school the next day. She wasn't at lunch again, but I found her after-school standing outside the student councils office, pounding on the glass.

"Come on, come on. Please go my way."

I came walking past. "Hey, want to get out of here."

She looked at me, and the minute I saw the spark I new I would be here a while, "Not now. Student council is voting on Meatless Monday's."

"Again?" I asked as I leaned up against the wall and put my hands in my pocket.

She looked at me, disappointed almost, "No, it was held off, remember?"

At that moment Douche came over in _his_ little button up shirt and opened the door, ignoring me and facing Kat.

She looked at _him_ nervously, "What, it was defeated?"

"It passed by three votes," Douche told her, _his_ accent chipping and cold.

Her mouth opened as she stared at _him_ for a moment.

"Your Monday's will forever more be meat free!" Douche exclaimed.

"We did it!" Her face was so joyous and happy. "Thank you so much."

And then she jumped up and hugged _him_. She. Hugged. _Him_.

And _he_ held her just as tightly back. And I was the third wheel, standing there, watching.

"I only did it so you would stop hounding me," Douche said jokingly.

Kat turned to me, shrugged her shoulders and had a silly smile on her face. Even the smile that usually made me grin couldn't change how i was feeling right now. Cold, empty, lonely, _betrayed_. My face was set in stone in a mask of hatred, disgust, and distaste that I felt for Douche. I hated _him_, and when _he_ turned around and saw my glaring face, I'm sure _he_ knew I didn't like _him_ either. I knew that she would kill me if she knew, but I was also trying to stake my claim. Kat is _mine_.

Douche turned around, "I should go back inside, before Tabitha has me sought out and cornered."

The minute Douche walked back inside the office Kat turned to me, her smile still fresh form her victory.

"Oh, Yes. Can you believe this?" I smirked at her, and could bring myself to soften up my rigid pose- now that _he_ was out of sight.

"That's nice. Can we go now?" My patience was brimming on overflowing, and it was about ready to explode.

"That's it? I finally change something for the better around here and all you say is 'That's nice'," her smile was slowly draining away.

"Well done mate, cherrio!" I told her in a British accent with a straight face, imitating Douche's. I was still pissed at her for even thinking of coming near Douche. I was hurt by her, and not ready to forgive her quite yet.

"Well, look who's a doosh now," she frowned at me then walked away, obviously disappointed. No matter how much I cared about her, I couldn't bring myself to go comfort her and apologize. I was still to rung up about Douche.

* * *

I ignored her, trying to forget about her all weekend. She didn't call and I didn't want her to. I needed to cool off, place my anger somewhere else for a while.

When Monday did come, I still got that tingling anticipation around lunch. I got to see her. I bought my Meatless Lunch, and I slid in next to her. She looked tired, hurt, and disappointed. If you didn't know her as well as I did, you would think she just looked pensive, but Kat never is just, _pensive._ She is too complicated of a girl for that.

"Can I join you?" I asked, after I sat down.

"Only if you promise not to say "I told you so"," she said, her voice sounding just as she looked.

She collected her self for a moment. "You were right about Blank, he is such a doo... doohead," she paused for a minute. "I got to stop using that word."

"So Blank's a douche." I stared at her for a second, "I told you so."

"I can't believe I let him use me like that," she said, sounding so disappointed in herself.

"Well you changed things," I said while picking up the my meal. "Because of you I'm eating my first soy dog."

She watched me bring the dog to my mouth, smiling. "What do you think?"

I chewed thoughtfully, "It's not bad."

I thought for another minute, "But if you guys hate meat so much, then why does it taste like meat?"

She laughed at me like my question was stupid and threw the wrapper at me.

I smirked at her and asked again, "No I'm serious, what's up with that?"

She looked at me for a minute, trying to collect her thoughts, "Well, it's not that I hate the taste. It's just that whenever I see meat all I see is this little face saying- don't eat me."

"A-huh," I chewed and swallowed by bite, "And how long have you been having these hallusenation?"

"Four years," she glanced down at the soy dog before saying, "but this is defiantly the best one. You, eating a soy dog."

A chuckled and glanced down at the dog again, a thought striking me, making my smile drop from my face.

"I'm not going to grow man-boobs like the guy form Entouage, right?"

She laughed for a minute, and I felt my stomach do a flip.

"Oh, right. I forgot to tell you that part," She nodded her head. "Don't worry, you'll look great in a B-cup."

A smiled back at her, meeting her eyes and watched her smile too as I said, "Thank you."

Her smile turned into a smirk, "Your welcome."


	5. The Winner Takes it All

**Thank you for everyone who commented and corrected my spelling of "Douche". I really appreciate it, and updated the chapter with the spelling corrections. **

**Please feel free to comment if something doesn't make sense or if something is wrong with my spelling or grammar- or just review/comment in general!**

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I found Kat easily at the end of the day at her locker. She ridiculed me the second I walked up to her- after she jumped and accused me of sneaking up on her.

"How is it that you always know where to find me?" She asked, eyebrows raised in anticipation.

I chuckled and looked at her, "You're the one who's easily identifiable in a crowd."

Kat glared at me, while slamming her locker shut and walking down the hall, knowing I would follow.

"Are you saying I'm _loud_?" She asked coldly.

"No," I insisted, "I'm saying that you are so different from everyone else here, that I could pick you out, _SNAP!_, just like that." I snapped my fingers together, emphasizing my point.

Kat snorted and watched as her sister walked into the classroom that they're holding talent show sign-ups at.

"Great, I have to wait for Bianca to finish with the sign-ups," she said stiffly.

I looked at her with my eyebrows raised, "Okay then. You want to hangout later, or are you busy?"

"Sorry, I have a history final to study for," she told me, not sounding too sorry at all. She stopped outside the classroom her sister went it, by the staircase opposite of the door. We could see in through the windows and were out of everyone else's way.

She turned her head to look in the window, and snorted. I followed her gaze, and saw Joey Donner doing some type of jig. Bianca glanced out the window and Kat gave her a thumbs-up, Bianca pressing her lips together and nodding her head.

"That guy's a weirdo," I commented, as he started to do more of his jig.

"Of course he is, he's dating my sister," she sounded disgusted as she turned around so her back was towards her sister, "Who's impressive karaoke skills will probably score her three seconds of face time on televisions number one gymnastic drama, making her even more impossible to be around."

She continued to walk away, and I followed her, my eyebrows raised. There was defiantly years of pent up anger that was involved in that one statement.

I looked at her, and in a sing-song voice I sang my claim, "Someone's jealous."

She scoffed, "Me? Jealous of Bianca? That's stupid, you're stupid."

At that moment, Cameron the Giant passed by.

"Hey Kat, can I borrow your pen?" He passed through us, snapping his fingers, pulling a pen from out of Kat's hair- exclaiming, "Oh! What do you think? I'm practicing for the talent show, thus my practice cape." With a flourish he moved his cape around.

Kat looked at me, gaze skeptical, "Didn't even know he did magic."

I nodded my head, "Impressive."

"Oh, it runs in my blood," Cameron nodded excitedly. He reminded me of a dog, "My gay uncle had a show off strip in Vegas called "Abraca Fabulous". He's teaching me all his secrets while he's sleeping on our couch. Wait till you see my guillotine trick- you will lose your _heads_!"

I looked at Kat, smirking, and she just shook her head.

"You get it?" Cameron asked, "Cause of the _guillotine_."

When Kat and I didn't say anything, Cameron- with a flourish of his cape, spun away, "Okay, goodbye scary people."

We were left in his wake, confetti blowing everywhere.

"Poor kid. It's like middle school all over again."

Immediately, Kat pounced, "Ooo, what happened? I love origin stories."

"He was singing 'My Girl' on stage at this stupid concert choir thing, when he uh," I paused, not quite sure how to put this nicely. "Let's just say he became aroused."

Kat made a surprised scoff. "Poor guy."

She thought for a minute. "Is that why people call him-"

"Spoink," I finished for her, "Yup. I came up with it."

She suppressed a laugh, and then turned to me and actually started laughing as I smiled at her.

At that moment, my phone beeped. I took it out of my pocket. My mom texted me, telling me she was coming home early. Shit.

I looked up at Kat, "I got to go, see you later."

"Bye," she said, sounding a bit disappointed.

I sped home, and thankfully got home minutes before my mom did.

"How was your day honey?" She called up the stairs.

"Fine. It was like always," I called back.

I stared up at the ceiling, wondering what I should do, when I sat up and turned on my computer. I opened Google and typed in 'Abraca Fabulous'.

* * *

I found her after school the next day, talking to Cameron the Giant. Or Spoink. I really hadn't even remembered that he used to be called that until Kat brought it up yesterday. I had graced him with a new nickname, seeing as he grew a whole head taller than me in one summer.

"It's not gay magic, there's just a lot of rhinestones," I heard Cameron whine.

Kat was sitting on the stairwell by Cameron, talking to him when she saw me- and her eyes light up.

"Help me convince Cameron not to quit the talent show." She threw me a look at the end of the sentence, warning me not to say anything discouraging.

I just looked at Cameron with a straight face. "Don't quit."

Kat shook her head at me. _Not helping_, I could hear her hiss at me.

She turned to Cameron instead, "Everyone loves a dark horse. You're as dark as it gets. You could win." She finished, her voice passionate while her fist pumped in the air.

Oh God. I could see that this isn't going to end well already.

"Well I don't know what to tell you," Cameron said, slapping his hands down on his knees to signify defeat. "I can't cut off my own head."

Kat swayed her head from said to side, "Fine. I'll be your assistant."

Both Cameron and I laughed at the same time, but I'm pretty sure Cameron wasn't thinking, _Holy shit she's got to be kidding me._

She looked at us, "What's so funny?"

Cameron pointed his wand back and forth between us- stuttering, "I-I-I'm sorry. It's- no offense, it's just, you really don't seem like an assistant. You seem more like a boss."

"Cameron, I'm just trying to help you out," she said, trying to get him to make eye contact with her.

"Sure you are," I said. I already knew where this was headed the minute she opened her mouth. I had just been silently praying that she wouldn't be crazy enough to put herself in danger to beat her sister in a _talent show_, so that she would be in the spotlight for once.

"He deserves to win. I want people to stop calling his Spoink," she said, feigning innocence.

Cameron looked up raising his hands in the air, appalled, "They still call me that? It wasn't my fault. It was the unfortunate convergence of puberty and corduroy pants."

Kat leaned in, her elbow on his shoulder, her voice low, "This is your chance to live that down."

"No pun intended," I stated quickly, just to make sure he didn't get the wrong idea, or to make sure he did if he didn't.

"Shut up," Kat told me. Patting Cameron on the chest she added, "Let's do a kick-ass magic show."

"Okay. Alacazam!" he exclaimed with I whip of his wand. "Now lets start with the basics. What do you know about trap doors?"

He got up and started walking away, Kat at his heels as she shrugged.

"I can't hear you!" He sang back to her.

"I got nothing," she told him, walking away.

At that moment, Pudgy, otherwise known by the majority of the population as Brad, walked by. I quickly reached out and grabbed his shirt, pulling it back to me.

"You still taking bets on the talent show?" I asked.

"Chastity's the favorite," he said while peeling my hand off his shirt, "but people are saying that the new blonde chick might make this interesting."

"I'll put fifty down on Cameron James," I said, still looking at Kat and Cameron, keeping my eye on them as they sat on a bench at the end of the hall.

"Spoink?" Pudgy scoffed at me while walking up the staircase, "It's your funeral Verona."

I glared at him, then turned my attention back to one new, sexy magician's assistant.

* * *

I bought my talent show ticket that next morning. There was no way I was going to miss this. I would not let Cameron chicken out. Plus, I wanted to see Kat in this dress that she was trying to get out of wearing earlier.

When I arrived at the show my seat ended up being next to her fathers. Joy.

"I'm surprised to see you here," he turned to look at his video camera, turning it on. "I thought you would have graduated by now."

Well I can see were Kat gets her sarcasm from.

"I'm just here to support your daughter," I told him proudly.

"Doesn't Bianca have her own boyfriend to support her?" he looked back at his camera again before adding quickly, "not that I like that."

"No, I'm here for Kat," I told him, like it was obvious. Why the hell would I be here for Bianca? Walter gave me a look that translated to, _yeah right_.

"You didn't know? She's in the show."

"She would never," he stated, like it was a fact.

"She would," I stated back. I smiled, "In a sexy dress no less."

I liked to play with Walter, and as his face turned red I made sure to change the subject quickly.

"Oh, does that thing have zoom," I leaned in to have a look.

"I get it," Walter told me, pulling away. "You're punking me again."

This time, I was disappointed that Kat wouldn't tell him. I was disappointed that he wouldn't believe me, which is why I brought out the program I picked up and pointed to her name.

"Kat Stratford," I read, and when he didn't respond I continued with, "see I can read."

"Why would Kat enter a talent show? What did they want to do, adopt a whale or something?" It was sad to see that even Walter himself didn't know his own daughter as well as he thought. In this case, I knew her far better than he did.

"Well my theory is-" I paused for dramatic effect, "is that she's jealous."

"Jealous? Of whom?" Walter asked sounding pretty pissed off.

I just nodded my head towards his shirt, reading _Bianca's Dad_ in big, black lettering.

He looked down at his shirt before shaking his head, "Oh dear."

I shrugged my shoulders and turned away smiling, "This is gonna be good."

Walter looked at me like I was crazy, and before he could say anything, my good friend Holland came out on the stage and tapped on the microphone.

"Welcome to the Padua High talent show. A reminder, if your phone rings it will be confiscated." She smiled, and I knew there was a bad joke coming.

"And I need a new one. So go ahead, make my day," she said, lowering her voice and chuckling. Like I suspected, not funny. The audience was quite, practically screaming _REALLY?_

"Next year I'm writing my own material. Now please welcome Allan Griswald on the accordion." She clapped politely and moved the microphone so that we could hear him play.

No offense to Allen, but he was boring as hell. The only reason I came here was to see Kat. Honestly, if Kat weren't here I would be someone else right now. I would be at a bar or at the record store. No one would be able to say that they saw me here, or at any school functions actually. I could see what she does to me, how she's changed me. Why couldn't she?

Finally Holland appeared back on stage. "Thank you for getting the show off to such a rousing start. Now for our second act of the evening, Cameron James, master of magic."

Some cheesy music started as the curtain was drawn Cameron whipped open his cape, "Ladies and gentlemen-"

"Spoink!" Someone from the audience called out. I glared at the direction of the noise before turning my attention back to Cameron. Cameron's eyes found mine, and I gave him a meaningful nod

He paused for a minute. "Prepared to be amazed. Straight from the back streets of Vegas I bring you- Abraca Fabulous!"

Everyone clapped as the Abraca Fabulous signed light up.

"But no magician would be complete without his beautiful assistant. Please welcome Katerina!" With a flourish he opened the box, and Kat appeared, waving her hand out at the audience.

She flashed a smile, and I smiled back as my eyes raked over her. She was wearing a form fitting blue, _sparkly_ dress, white gloves, and diamond jewelry. She looked stunning- until she made a face like she wanted to puke.

"Katerina you may come out of the magic box."

Kat stood there, frozen. _Shit_.

"Katerina, get out of the magic box," Cameron whispered to her.

Kat opened her mouth and nodded her head, but didn't move.

I turned to Walter to do my Scooby-Doo impersonation, "Ra-ro." He was always my favorite cartoon character.

"Please tell my this is part of the act," Walter said, voice urgent.

We quickly whipped our heads back to the stage.

"Perhaps she will easily come out with the use of my magic cane," Cameron said, poking Kat with the cane, once he took it out with a florish.

Walter and I looked at each other at the same time again.

"This is not good," he informed me.

_No shit_, I wanted to inform_ him_.

We both whipped our heads back to the stage again.

So Cameron finally got Kat out of the box. The poor girl looked like she was about to fall over any minute now. The first couple acts were easy. All Cameron had to do was have her hold his hat while he took random items out, or stand still while he found a pen in her hair.

The tricky part came when it was time for the disappearing act.

Cameron turned to the audience, "Katerina please lower thyself into this mysterious chest."

She lowed herself in, with Cameron pushing her in as he said, "The show must go on."

He finally got her into the box so he could close it. She looked panicked, and placed her white-gloved fingers against the glass- like she wanted nothing more than to disappear.

"This chest always seemed to have a problem for me," Cameron started as he covered the box with his cape. "It always seemed to have quite the appetite!"

With a flourish he removed his cape to find that Kat was gone. I smiled and clapped, he might actually have a chance of winning this thing if Kat gets her act together.

"Not to worry. My lady Katerina is only trapped between realms."

He covered the chest again and when he removed it, Kat wasn't there.

Walter and I glanced at each other, shaking our heads, both knowing that we shouldn't have gotten our hopes up.

Cameron looked around frantically, "Katerina quit messing around."

I lowered Walter's video camera, knowing that the disappointment was apparent on my face.

The audience got restless, and finally Cameron turned to the audience, "Apparently, our Katerina has decided that this would be a great time for her dinner break, and so that's the show for tonight."

People started clapping as Cameron said, bowing, "Thank you all for coming, and have a wonderful night."

The curtains closed and Holland came back on stage to introduce Joey Donner.

"I'll be right back," I told Walter. I stalked off backstage to find either Kat or Cameron.

I found Cameron first.

"Come on," I told him, grabbing him by the collar, "Let's get you back out there."

"Wait what?" Cameron asked.

"You heard me, let's go."

When he wouldn't move I grabbed his tux with both hands and pushed him backwards onto the stage.

"No. I'm not going back out there," he said, panicked while he tried to push me away.

There was no way in hell I was letting go, "Yes you are. I've got fifty bucks riding on you that I don't have."

"Well then you shouldn't have bet on me. Don't you know it's illegal?" He stopped walking when I stopped pushing him, but stayed were he was.

"Do it for yourself Spoink," I told him, pushing him. I wanted him to get mad, I sure as hell was.

"Look," I started, pointed at his chest, "all those kids out there already think that you're a loser. You want to prove them right?" I raised my eyebrows at this, my expression still angry.

He looked nervous all of a sudden. "Wait, did you just give me a pep talk?"

I didn't answer him in words, but by pushing him through the curtain.

He stood there for a minute and said, "Hello again folks. I just came out to get... my... pen." He trailed off.

I brushed my hair off my face in frustration. This so wasn't going well for me.

My hoped jumped a little when I heard, "I got sunshine... on a cloudy day."

I looked around for the accordion dude, Allen. He was standing off stage holding the thing. I gabbed him by the shoulder, "Go out there and play with him."

I shoved him out on stage, giving him one of my famous "death stares" as the student body like to call it, before leaving. When I heard the accordion start to play with Cameron, I glared at the curtain guy and he automatically opened the curtains. I had to admit to a job well done.

I didn't wait backstage for Cameron, but went to go find Kat. I found Kat when Cameron was halfway though the song talking to her sister. I couldn't make out the words, but I wasn't going to interrupt. They both needed this.

I watched them for a minute, but when I heard the audience clap I knew that was my cue. I ran backstage and made sure to greet Cameron with a nod and a clap on the shoulder.

"Nice work kid," I told him before walking away.

"Thank you," he called after me. I've been getting that a lot lately. _Thank you_. I must be becoming a saint.

* * *

Cameron didn't end up winning, and I now owe Pudgy fifty bucks. Which is fine because I'm planning on breaking into the secret stash of Monopoly money that I keep laying around somewhere.

I made sure to park my bike down the street before walking up to her house, climbing up the trellis, and opening the window. Her lights were on. I looked around the room and spotted her, laying on her bed, spread eagle. She didn't even flinch when I walked over to her, before I realized that her eyes were closed. She still had her blue dress on, make-up on and brown hair curled in perfect ringlets. A pair of blue shoes was strewn across the floor, along with some jewelry and the white gloves.

I bent down to pick up a ring that was on the floor, when she called out softly, "It's fake you know. You won't be able to sell it to pay up to Brad."

I dropped the ring back on the floor and raised my eyebrows at her when I turned around. She had propped herself on her elbows and was looking at me expectantly.

"Well hello there choker," I greeted her with.

Her face turned red, "Hey, at least I entered, unlike someone else who just sat by idly and watched. So please don't even start with me. I don't need this right now."

She flopped back down on her bed.

I came over and sat right next to her. She sat up immediately. I noticed that she still had the diamond necklace on, most likely fake as well. I reached out to touch it, and she tensed as I fingered the necklace. I let my fingers trail her skin and lower down to where her dress was sewn together in a "v". I took my hand off her and brushed her hair out of her face.

"You did amazing out there. I want you at _my_ next show," I mocked at her.

She closed her eyes and tilted her head back to hit it on her headboard, exposing more of her long neck.

"God, you just can't stop can you?," she said miserably.

"Nope," I replied with a smirk. I stood up, pulling her with me.

Her eyes snapped opened and she glared at me for a moment. I grabbed her shoulders and held her at arms length, waggling by brow.

"Don't I get a goodnight kiss?" I asked teasingly.

She shook her head, her eyes portraying amusement.

"Why not?" I pleaded, batting my eyelashes at her.

She scoffed at me, "Please, after the way you just acted all you deserve is a-"

I cut her off when my lips pressed against hers quickly.

I made it short but sweet, not wanting to take any chances. Even that short kiss sent sparks through my body.

"Goodnight," I told her when I pulled back, smiling.

"Goodnight," she replied, smiling as well.

I turned to go, "I'll call you tomorrow?" She asked hesitantly.

I smirked at her, "Sure. I'll be waiting."

She rolled her eyes as she followed me to the window.

I climbed out, and turned around at the last minute.

"Wait, I almost forgot to tell you something."

Annoyed, she gave me a look to speed it up, "For what it's worth, you look amazingly beautiful in that dress."

Her face changed from annoyance to surprise before relaxing and just looking at me, for _me._

I turned and climbed down the trellis before she could say anything, leaving her to shut the window and tuck herself in with a goodnight.


	6. Too Much Information

**Once again, thanks for the reviews. I really loved writing this chapter, so I hope you enjoy reading it...**

**Feel free to say that you love/hate what I've done with it.**

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I finally had decided I had nowhere else to go. Jack-ass had come home, yet again. Jack-ass was the one that my mom had married in spite of all of my efforts to push him away. He hated me, and the feeling was mutual. I mean, who would love a guy that treated you like shit, and was the replacement of someone you cared about, like an actual _dad_.

I sighed in frustration and kept walking, moving away from the park. The benches were wet and the sprinklers running, and there was no way I was sleeping there tonight.

I couldn't understand why Jack-ass was through with me. I showed up at home and he was chasing me off the lawn in seconds. The guy had been home for a whole day and he was already trying to get rid of me. My mom might as well have been just like him, sitting around and watching it happen. She actually just stood there and watched as Jack-ass kicked her son's butt out of _her _house. There was no way Jack-ass was going to let me in the house tonight, along with my mother. They both just needed a day or two to cool off, or before Jack-ass left again for his "job". If not, I would be flying solo for a while.

_He doesn't matter anymore_, I thought to myself as I approached her trellis, my bag on my back. I didn't grab that much before I left, but I grabbed my backpack and stuffed in it my toothbrush, deodorant, and a change of clothes- along with my notebooks.

I finally climbed up to her balcony with my bag. I stood in front of the window for a moment, making sure I wanted to do this. I had no one else to turn to, nowhere else to go. I couldn't use the money I had stay a hotel, but why would I do that even if I had the money, when I knew that I had a small chance of Kat letting me stay the night?

Besides all of that, I needed a distraction. I was about to explode, and it seemed like she always got my mind off of everything else but her. As much as it pained me to admit, I needed her tonight. I would be using her to distract myself and take my mind off of things, and I would have fun doing it.

Her window was dark and I tapped on it a few times. I waited in the cool night air for an answer. I tapped again. When there was no response I slowly opened the window, to find her not even in her room. I walked to the door and poked my head down the hall. I heard the shower running and someone humming the Beatles- most likely Kat.

There was no way in hell I would ever knock on the bathroom door, so I made myself at home by plopping down on the bed, in the same spot that I had been in not too long ago- when she was going off about _Meatless Monday_. My arms propped behind my head with ankles crossed. Truthfully, though, it was nice to take in the scenery- without the creator. I enjoyed just relaxing for a minute and just enveloping myself in _Kat_, without all the _talking_.

It wasn't too long before Kat came through the door- in plaid pajama pants, a large t-shirt, and her hair wrapped up in a towel. She was still humming as she shut the door, holding a laundry basket close to her hip. She turned around, gasping as she jumped, dropping the basket on the floor.

"Hi," I greeted her, with a charming smile.

She jumped and held her hand to her chest and turned away from me, "Oh my God, you sthcared the bejethus out of me!"

I got off her bed and walked over to her. Mockingly I said, "I mithed you." Which wasn't entirely true.

"Whath are you-" she paused to take her retainer out of her mouth, looking at me with wide, wandering eyes, "What are you doing here?"

Her eyes searched mine for some sort of answer, but right now I just needed to be comforted by her, and there was only one way to make her do that- without having to explain to her my life story.

"Aren't you going to say hello?" I asked smoothly, while bringing my hands to grasp her upper arms, so she couldn't get in a comeback in before I kissed her. Like always, she kissed me back, making me feel a hell of a lot better about myself. Just knowing she liked me enough to A) hangout with me, for a girl like Kat just doesn't hangout with anyone; and B) kiss me back just as passionately as I kissed her- even though she is always the one to break the kiss; made me want to lock her up and never let her go. Just her lips on mine alone would spread warmth throughout me, igniting a spark that was just what I needed now. I needed someone that could make things better when I was cold blooded and pissed off. I needed _her_. When my anger wasn't directed at her, Kat sure new how to warm me up and turn me into mush.

The kiss was short but sweet, leaving me wanting for more. When we separated Kat had a little smile on her face. With her eyes still shut as she said, "Hello," in a voice so dreamy, it made me want to know what she was thinking about.

My small smile turned in a smirk as she opened her eyes, like she had just given herself a mental slap in the face.

"You got to go now. If my dad finds you here he'll send me to a convent, and I have a real problem with organized religion." As she finished her sentence, she bounced up on her toes, another thing she did when she was talking abut something she was passionate about.

I tried reasoning with her some more. "If I'm really quite, can I say tonight?" I asked as I leaned forward for anther kiss. I knew I was being greedy, but I sure as hell needed it, and hopefully it would convince her to let me stay the night.

Unfortunately, she leaned out as I leaned in, pushing on my chest.

"No way." She shook her head and grabbed my shirt as she did this, "A) I'm not going to sleep with you until we talk about sex and discuss its implications. And B)-"

She paused for a minute to turn me around and push me towards the window while continuing, "When and if we do do it, it will be no were near my father."

Honestly, I was not that shocked that she would come to the conclusion that I wanted to have sex with her. I mean, it was the biggest rumor and practically all the _bimbos_ (as she likes to call them) would jump at the chance to be a witness to that, even though I have only ever had sex twice in my life. It still hurt though, knowing that we have spent all this time together and she still as the audacity to tell me I'm a player.

I didn't want a fight tonight, and the first thing that came out of my mouth when I turned around was, "You said _do do_."

When she glared at me for a moment, gaze unwavering. I knew I would have to let her in a little. If I did that, I might be able to get past her walls before they go back up again.

I sighed, and glanced back down at her mouth when I said, "Can I just crash here? I got kicked out."

Like I had planned, her whole demeanor changed. Her facial expression went from pissed to worried in a second.

"What happened?" She asked, genuinely concerned.

I was so not ready to tell her what had actually went down. I cared about her, but I wasn't ready to open myself up to her in this sort of way.

"I wet the bed," was my next quick answer, thinking how I just acted like a two year old with the whole _do do _ thing.

She rolled her eyes and, annoyed, asked, "Patrick, seriously?"

I looked at her and concluded with, "If you're going to keep talking all night, I'll just sleep in the park." That was a little harsh, but I was through with the examination. I was tired and not in the best of emotional states, and wasn't going to be putting on this act for her all night. I care about Kat but I sure as-hell wasn't going to stay here if she was going to ridicule me till morning.

She shook her head and sighed, "No stay. If you were horrifically murdered it would ruin my day." She turned and walked towards the door.

I watched her go before saying, "Thanks." I was pretty sure that was her way of telling me she cared about me, and it honestly confused me and filled me up all at once.

I turned to sit on her bed so I could unlace my boots while she locked the door.

"Which side of the bed do you want?" I asked, waggling my eyebrows at her jokingly when she turned back around.

She pointed to the ground and sternly said, "On the _floor_."

"Okay," I told her, getting up off the bed, hands slightly raised. I lowered my hands as I said, "But in the middle of the night, if you decide you want me-" I paused for dramatic effect as I took my shirt off and spread my arms out, "I'll be right here."

She looked at me, mouth agape for a moment, until I threw my shirt at her face. Her mouth closed automatically and the annoyed look immediately returned, throwing my shirt to the floor as I bent down to take my shoes off.

* * *

Spending the night in Kat Stratford's bedroom is a lot harder than it may seem. I didn't mind sleeping on the floor. She got me a blanket and pillow (which I threw aside and replaced with my bag), and I planted myself on the side of her bed. I made sure it was on the carpet so I wouldn't pull any back muscles while I slept. I made myself comfortable in the plush rug, and wrapped the blanket tighter around me.

When she came back armed with all my sleeping gear, her hair was also dried up in a ponytail. She had set camp up for me, and was getting into bed when I grabbed her arm and brought her into me.

"Don't I get a goodnight kiss?" I joked with her. She glared at me for a moment, and I quickly brought her closer to gain better access to her lips. I pressed my lips to hers and kept them there long enough to leave us both a little breathless when she finally pushed me away. My heart was pounding in my chest, and I could still feel the two warm spots left on my bare chest from her hands pushing against me.

Her eyes snapped open once the kiss was over with, "You're still sleeping on the floor."

I eyed her and sighed. It was always one step forward two steps back with her.

I nodded my head, eyebrows raised. I climbed into the blanket to show her that I was serious. She watched me and slowly got settled into her own bed.

"Goodnight," she murmured from her bed, so softly that I just barely made out what she said.

"Goodnight," I murmured back, just as softly.

Soon enough, sleep overtook her and I could hear her steady breathing. I sat up and saw her sleeping form breathing underneath the sheets. She was naturally beautiful, but she was gorgeous without her usually scowl or smirk plastered on her face. I had to smile at her sleeping face, so peaceful, calm, and stress-free.

I took in a deep breath and let it out slowly. I had to stop acting like this. At the rate we were moving, this relationship wasn't going to work out anyway, so why even try to work things out? Why not just let the pieces fall were they may? But no, we can't do that. Kat has to maneuver them herself, placing them where she wants them. Well, with her doing so, there was no way in hell that I was ever going to get anything out of her.

My thoughts were heavy, and so became my eyelids. I soon drifted off into sleep, thoughts of a certain brunette drifting in my mind.

* * *

I woke up in the Stratford's kitchen, the room dark and Kat slapping my face. My mouth was full of something, and I looked down and realized the cupcake in my hand before looking up into her startled eyes.

I felt sick as I asked her, "Did I just eat this?"

She nodded her head as she took the plate from me, "And eleven of its friends."

"Oh crap," I told her quickly, "I sleep walk sometimes."

"You don't say," she remarked. Her voice got motherly, more parent-like and soothing, "Go upstairs quietly, I'll clean this up."

I nodded my head as I finished chewing my bite, turning to walk upstairs. I rushed up, making my way to the bathroom and wondered how the hell I had managed to get so dirty. I cleaned off and went back to her room. I shoved on my shirt, shoes and jacket. I picked up my bag, placing the blanket on the bed before climbing out of the window of down her trellis.

I was walking away, my stomach queasy. _I had to go_, I told myself. If I had stayed, I would have to eventually explain the sleep-eating to her. There was only one reason I sleep- eat, ever. That is because I'm stressed out. If I told her that, then she would ask questions- ones that I'm not fully ready to answer. Questions that make me want to puke.

I walked to school and fell asleep under a tree. I woke up bright and early the next morning, wishing I didn't have to be here today. I made sure to find Kat before school, laughing with some other brown haired chick.

"Hey, is it cool that I borrow your car after school tomorrow?" I had totally forgot until a couple minutes ago about my therapist appointment. It was scheduled twice a month, and I had never missed one- with the excepting of having the stomach bug. Sadly, I needed to talk to Leo tomorrow. He was a cool guy and has become a good friend. He was really the only one I could trust to tell me what to do when I was feeling all screwed up like this.

"I'll see you in class," Kat told the girl she walked away. Kat looked around for a moment before grabbing my arm and pushing me into the closet.

I smiled at her as she turned around, "Kat, I don't have time to make out right now."

"What's up with you?" She paused for an answer. She kept going when she didn't get one, "I come back from cleaning up your cupcake carnage and you're gone."

"Turns out your floor it's that comfortable," I mocked.

"Patrick, this is serious. You were sleep-eating. Which according to What', is brought on by stress."

"That's fascinating," I changed the subject back to what really mattered. "Can I borrow your car or not?"

She looked at me for a moment.

"Why do you need it? Where's your bike?"

I shrugged. "It's been confiscated."

"By your parents. What happened? If you're in some kind of trouble just tell me." Her eyes widened as she spoke, and I was sure I saw a glimpse of care shimmer through them.

"Okay I'm in trouble."

"What's going on?" She asked _again_, eyes worried now.

"What's going on is that you wont stop asking me questions." I smiled as I said this, trying to lighten the mood. I hated the worried look on her face, and just wanted to wipe it off.

What I said made her throw her head back, "Ha, ha, ha. Well you're not borrowing my car now."

I looked at her, disappointed, "Thanks."

I stormed out of the room and down the hall, as far away from her as possible.

* * *

I slept in the same spot as the previous night, under the tree outside school. I didn't talk to Kat all the next day. I stood outside at the end school, waiting patiently by her car. She came up behind me, keys held up high.

"Here, take my car."

I reached up and grabbed the keys from her before she could change her mind, "Really? What's the catch?"

Kat could be nice, but she wasn't _this_ nice- at least, not to me anyway.

"No catch. You're just a friend in need."

"Just like that?" I asked, just to make sure she wasn't kidding around.

"Just bring it back it one piece."

"Okay. You need a ride home?"

"No. I'm good," she looked down at her feet. "Drive safe."

"Okay thanks," I said with a chuckle, "you're weird when you're nice."

She pressed her lips together and shook her head at me, turning to watch me get in the car, start her up and take her for a spin.

I drove to the office, parking safely. I walked inside the large complex building and sat in the waiting room on level four. Leo was a pretty cool guy. Even though he was old- old, like, gray hair and glasses old, he was still cool. He knew how to talk to me treated me like I was any other person. He treated me as an equal, and respected him and liked him. He understood _me_, partly because he's a therapist and partly because he's just good like that.

Amy, the secretary, waved me in. I was early, but apparently so was Leo.

I closed the door quietly and plop down on the beanbag chair that was mine alone. I had brought it with me when I was younger, not wanting to lie on the couch. I still sit there every time.

* * *

I sighed as I walked out of the building complex that Leo worked in. It was always a relief to talk to him. I had gotten used to it. At first, I thought it was stupid, but now, I got the jest of it.

I walked over to Kat's car, when I heard someone a lot like her say, "He's not peeing. He's collecting samples for our organic line. Here you go, free gift, new customer." I looked over to see Kat it a Josie May car, pink visor on and everything. A pink woman was talking to her threw the window, which she was closing.

Kat. What the hell was she doing here? I couldn't even let myself process anything before I stormed over there and knocked on the window.

"What?" Kat screeched, thinking I was the pink woman. She looked at me with wide eyes as she rolled down the window.

"You followed me?" I accused right away. There was no way she ended up here by chance.

"No," she paused to think, touching the visor, "This is just my new after-school job." I shook my head at her, aggravated, angry and disappointed. I started to walk away and she called after me and she climbed out of the car.

I turned on her, "So you're stalking me now?"

"We're not stalking you. Cameron and I just have a lot of questions," she said, innocently enough.

"No," Cameron cried out, causing me to turn to face him. "I don't have any questions. Not a one. In fact, I have answers- to homework questions. I'm going to go sit in the car."

Cameron turned to walk away, and that was my cue to make an exit.

"Where are you going?" She asked. I didn't answer.

"See, this is exactly why I had to follow you. Any time anyone wants to talk to you, you walk off."

I turned at her, annoyed as hell. I wanted her to leave me alone.

"I was at my therapist office. He's really good. You want his card?" My voice sounded tired, not as sharp and angry as it did moments ago.

"Therapist? I though-"

"You thought what?" I cut her off. "I was going to my secret crack den so me and my baby momma can tat each other up?"

"No," she paused for a minute, "I don't know. Why are you seeing a therapist?"

"Let's just say I'm not really having a Josie May day."

She rolled her eyes at me and took the visor off, running her fingers through her hair. She looked up and I threw her the keys to her car, stalking off in the opposite direction, ignoring her calls after me.

* * *

I had started to cool down, my walk slowing down to a rhythmic pace. She was just so irritating sometimes. She didn't let me in, yet she just wanted me to open the floodgates for her. Now way. This is a two way street. I'm not going into this with her if she wasn't going along with the plan either.

I heard a car zooming up the street, and didn't even look behind me when I heard Kat.

"Look, I'm sorry. I shouldn't have followed you." Her voice was wavering, but she got it under control as she continued, "At least let me give you a ride home. We don't even have to talk!"

That got me. I stopped walking while I thought about the twenty-five miles it would take for me to walk back to school. I turned and got in the car.

She pulled away and waited for my direction.

"Just drop me back at school," I instructed her. My voice was heavy, lifeless.

"I can take you all the way home. It's no problem." A glare from me was all it took for her sweet little innocent voice to turn defensive as she turned the corner, "Okay, school it is."

I turned to look out the windshield.

The car was silent, neither of us talking. I was still too pissed off to start up a conversation.

"So how 'bout them Dodgers?" Kat asked awkwardly. I could tell she usually didn't talk about stuff like this.

"I'm a Padres fan." I told her, the annoyed twinge still in my voice.

She turned to face me as she talked, "See, something I didn't know about you. Sharing is fun."

I finally asked the question that has been nagging the back of my mind ever sense she pulled up to the curb, "Why do you care do much?"

"Because," she started, twiddling her thumbs on the steering wheel.

"Because what?" I pressed.

"I just care about you okay." She said while looking at me, and I could see in her eyes how much I disappointed her my getting angry, and how upset she was. "God, I'm sorry. I'll stop."

The confession made my stomach twinge and caused my heart beat to race.

_She cares. About ME. ME._

"What do you want to know?" I asked. She had admitted something willingly by putting herself out there. The least I could do for her was give her what she has been wanting this while time- answers.

"Why are you in therapy?" A simple question receives a simple answer.

I faced her, "You were right. Sleep-eating is from stress, caused by my stepfather. He's a jack-ass."

"Thank you for telling me," she said. She glanced at me, and I could tell that it meant a lot to her that I had opened up, knowing that I kept my walls as high as she did. It was weird sharing stuff with her. I didn't think she was gong to react this way, and was half expecting her to break out into some angry riot. Thank God she didn't. She understood. She understood, and I think it was as this moment in my life when I realized that even the people you least expect to care about you and understand you actually _do_.

"So what's in the package?" She asked suddenly.

"A snuggie," I answered simply. We were being truthful after all.

She laughed and looked at me as if that was a ridiculous idea.

I shrugged my shoulders, "Who wouldn't want a blanket with arms?"

She sighed and shook her head. She turned her head back to the road and turned the stereo on. The rock and roll band blasted through the speakers, and I glanced down at her hand that was lying on the seat next to her leg, thrumming to the beat.

On an impulse, I reached down and took her hand in mine, giving it a squeeze. She looked at our hands and then at me, a question in her eyes. I hoped my eyes portrayed everything I wanted to say to her as I smiled.

_Thank you for understanding._

I think she got the message. She smiled nervously at me, squeezing back- _You're Welcome._


	7. Just One Kiss

"Hey," she waved at me, getting my attention. She was smiling and there was bounce in her step.

"Hey, " I replied back.

She wasted no time in filling me in, "Do you want to see this cool modern art show with me tonight?"

I was flattered that she would ask me to go with her, but there was no way I was going to a modern art show.

"Hmm, let me think for a sec. Spend the night staring at blobs of paint and pretending they don't look like bird crap."

"Ahh, but this is different," she paused for dramatic effect as she held a finger up at me, "some of his painting are made with bird droppings. He believes in using everyday materials..."

She was just getting started too, the spark in her eyes and the bouncing of her feet. She drifted off when I started nodding my head at her, a mocking gape on my mouth. She planted herself firmly on the ground, and looked at me, disappointed.

She finally just shook her head and said sadly, "Ack- never mind."

We held each other's gazes for a moment before turning in the opposite direction and heading to class.

* * *

I let her be for the night, partly because I finally snuck home. The house was dark and quiet, meaning one thing. Jack-ass wasn't home. If Jack-ass wasn't home I could make the assumtion that he was "back on the road"- whatever the hell that was supposed to mean.

I walked through the house and found my mom was sleeping. Her clothes still on and her body was strewn across the couch. I pulled the afghan down over her, making sure she was warm for the night. I gathered my things and hopped into the shower, making sure to take my time. When Jack-ass wasn't home, I didn't need to worry. He brought all this extra stress and tension into my world and into the house that was not needed. No matter how hard I tried, I couldn't figure out why he hated me so much. It definitely wasn't something I did to him. I made a point to stay out of his way and to igore him. Every now and then, he did crazy things, like throw me out. It was my theory that he was jealous of me. I got to stay and interact with my mom and he didn't. Or maybe my mom told him that she loved me more than she loved him-whatever her concept of love is.

Whatever his reasons were, I still thought he was a jack-ass and didn't want anything to do with him. My mother... well my mother was different story. When she wasn't working, she was passed out on the couch or on her bed, rebooting her system for her next shift. I rarely ever saw her. When I did see her awake, she usually didn't care what I had to say. I was alone in the world. I knew it and most everyone who saw me knew it. Then came Kat.

She was the first girl to actually _get me_. She understood what it was like to be me in some sense, and in a way she was just like me. An outsider, and outcast. But unlike her, I wanted absolutely nothing to do with society. I wanted to stay in my corner of the world with my walls up and take it all in. Kat... was pretty much the opposite. She had to be involved in every little thing. Her and I clashed but fit so perfectly together. It was weird how the universe worked that way. The people that are the most different are the people that are the best fit for each other.

I sighed as I made my way into my bedroom and slid underneath the covers of my bed. My bed has been somewhere that I haven't been in a while. Just the comfort of my own bed made me grateful sometimes, the warmth enveloping me. No matter were I was though, the dreams I have of _her_ made lonely nights like these worthwhile.

* * *

I woke up the next morning to the buzz of my alarm. I shut it off quickly and hopped out of bed. I got changed and packed my bag for school. Jack-ass wouldn't be home for a while. When he left he usually didn't come back for weeks. My mom wouldn't care if I was home or not, so I would be able to make regular trips home.

I found the keys to my bike and made my way to school. I parked, and braced myself for another day. Kat caught up with me as I walked to lunch.

"Hey Patrick," she called up the stairs.

I turned to her and automatically asked, "How lame was the art show?"

"Not lame at all actually," she informed me, "His work has this savagery to it that is really... _primal_."

I scrunched my nose, "Sounds kinky."

"Blank was there," she informed me. I turned away from her and stuffed my hands even further down into my pockets.

"Blank, what a stupid name. What, his parents too lazy to come up with, like, Bob?" I asked. Douche. I know she hated that name and I restrained myself from calling him that in front of her.

"It's a nickname, his name is William," she informed me, yet again.

"Still lame," I announced, a displeased look crossing my face.

"It was a weird night," she assured me and I took a seat in front of her, "in addition to the bloody limbs and severed dolls heads... he asked me out."

The second half of her sentence came out staggered, like she was afraid to mention this to me.

"Oh yeah," I commented, squinting my eyes at her.

"Yeah," she paused and contemplated something, "I mean, yeah."

I sat up straighter, every nerve on end as I asked, "So what did you say?"

"What do you think I said?" She asked back, her mouth thinning.

"I don't know, I wasn't there. Are you gonna go?" My heart was beating harder in my chest and I prayed that something good would come out of this conversation. Knowing us, it wouldn't anyway.

She raised her eyebrows at me. "Why would I do that?"

"Why wouldn't you?"

She looked at me for a moment, shocked. "So you have no problem with me going on a _date_ with him?"

_Yes I do have a problem with that, _ I almost said. _Almost._

"Why would I? This is a free country. You remind me of that all the time. If you want to go, go."

She smiled a tight smile, "Okay, I will."

"Have a nice time," I added, my jaw tight.

"I plan on it." She stared at me for a second in disbelief and disgust, her face turning to disappointment before she rolled her eyes and walked away.

All I could do was stare after her and wonder why I had done something so stupid.

* * *

The rest of the day I couldn't think. I was in a haze, replying the talk that Kat and I had during lunch. Why was I so stupid sometimes?

_Maybe I'm just a wuss_, I thought to myself. I don't deserve someone like Kat. She is high-spirited, amazing, smart, beautiful,... and I was letting her slip right through my fingers.

_Maybe it's just me_, was my next thought. When all your life the ones you loved and cared about were the ones to hurt you, eventually you build up walls. The walls I built were high enough so people couldn't reach the top. Kat had reached the top all right, and was gaining ground. All in all, you could say I was scared. Yes, me, Patrick Verona, _scared_. I was scared that if I let Kat in and cared about her, she would disappoint me and let me down, just like all the others had.

By the end of the day, I had overheard Douche talking to a geek buddy, gloating how he was going to take _Kat Stratford_ out on a date to see _Trés Jolie_. He made her seem like a piece of freaking meat that he had claimed as his own.

I did the first thing that came to mind. I bought a ticket to go see the movie. It was the simplest thing I could have done, but I was not letting Kat go to a make-out movie with some guy who wore _sweater vest_. Come on, I'm not giving up that easily. I was prepared to fight for her, and if that's what it'll take, well, she's worth it.

* * *

I made it to the movie about fifteen minutes late. I figured nothing would have really happened in fifteen minutes. Boy was I wrong. I got there, hanging over the balcony and watched as Kat and Douche chatted it up like old pals. She laughed now and then at something he said. It had only been twenty minutes and I could feel it- the burning in my blood. It wasn't a longing or an aching- and I remembered this feeling so clearly from the last time I saw Douche. I was jealous. Why I had let Douche get his hands all over my territory was beyond me.

Why Kat had let him walk all over her was beyond me as well. I mean, this guy betrayed her. She gave him two weeks and he was allowed back into her life, just like that. If this were me we still wouldn't be talking.

I watched them intensely as Douche handed Kat something to eat once the make-out sessions were getting heavy. It made me gag watching all these students feel each other up. Kat had something on her lip and Douche leaned in to wipe it off with his finger. My body tensed up and my mouth went dry, and I almost lost it. He had touched her. He had leaned forward and touched her lips, and she had let him. Then when he grabbed her hand, I finally couldn't watch anymore. I turned and left just as she pulled her hand out of his grasp.

My adrenaline was high and I was pissed as hell. If looks could kill, I was as positive as hell mine could.

I turned the corner coming down the stairs and caught up with them both.

"Where do you think you're going?" I asked the question nonchalantly, but I let the anger welling up inside me explode as a pushed Douche into the lockers.

"Patrick?" Kat called out to me and was pulling on us both. She was waving at us both and trying to pull us apart. My grip on Douche was tight and firm, my hands balled up in his sweater vest.

Douche pushed back against me, "Well I guess congratulations are in order. It seems like you're walking on two legs."

"Okay," Kat said, pulling on us.

I slammed him into the lockers again and coldly asked, "Why don't you get on your broomstick and fly back to whatever Harry Potter movie you came from?"

"Stop it," Kat called to us again, agitated. I ignored her.

Douche said blatantly, "I don't want to hurt you."

I almost laughed in his face. He's trying to be the good samaritan in front of Kat. I didn't care about being the "good samaritan". I wanted this guys butt on the floor for coming and invading in on my territory, and I told him, "That's weird 'cause I want to hurt you- a lot."

That moment Douche pushed against me. I was caught off-guard and let him go. Kat was sent backwards into the hall with the picnic basket. I looked down to find Douche in some sort of karate position. His hands were in open chop positions, one over his head and one out in front of him, legs crouched to the ground.

I snorted and asked, "Are you kidding me?"

He launched himself at me, pushing and shoving. I wouldn't call this a fist fight because all we did was push and shove at each other, neither of us wanting to throw the first punch.

"Alright! Sorry guys but who ever beats the crap out of the other does not win me!"

I acknowledged Kat's scream at us by pushing Douche off me and into the lockers. I pointed a finger at him and yelled, "Stay away from my girlfriend!"

There, I said it. I stalked off leaving Douche cowering against the lockers to catch up with Kat.

I had just said that she was my _girlfriend_. It just slipped. Now that it was out, I didn't want to take it back.

In my own way, it was like showing her how much I cared for her. She bluntly told me that she cared for me, and I returned the favor by labeling her something. Something that you just don't call every girl on the street. Something that shows someone that you care about them enough to let them in.

I jogged up behind her and grabbed her arm. When I turned her to face me, she didn't sneer or push me away, which I took as a good sign.

There was nothing I could think of to say, so I stated the obvious and openly admitted to her, "Okay, I do have I problem with you seeing other guys."

"Good, so we're exclusive," she answered me, her smile was smug as she walked away. I didn't expect that from her, and followed her up the hall.

"No, I'm going to see other people," I teased trying to lighten the mood, knowing that she isn't mad at me, "but I just don't want you to."

I smiled at her and she returned the smile, whacking me with the back of her hand before grabbing the front of my jacket and pulling me after her.

I let her pull me into a side hallway and push me up against the wall, and I grinned seeing the devilish smirk on her face. I tensed as she slid her hands over my toned stomach and relaxed as her lips met mine.

Her hands gripped the front of my jacket, holding me in place. I wrapped one hand around her waist while the other found its way into her hair. God, this felt so good, so _right_.

Besides, I wasn't giving her up again anytime soon. I had made that mistake once, and I wasn't going to make it again because I was scared of her and what she would do to me. I had opened myself up to her and I was ready for her to come in. My kisses turned hungry at this thought, possessive. I wanted everyone to know she was _mine_, and that there was no way in hell I was letting her go.

Our lips moved in synch with one another, both of us playing around. She was a good kisser, and I could feel my body start to melt against hers. If only she knew the things she did to me. Like how she had my head reeling, my heart beating a mile a minute, or how she made my stomach flutter or my pants tighten at the brush of her fingertips. At times like this she filled me with such joy it was unbelievable.

She chuckled lightly for some reason or another. I didn't even want to ask why. I just wanted her lips on mine again. I pulled her head forward more forcefully that I ever had, and let my tongue into her mouth when she gasped. She didn't push me away. Instead she slid her arms up my chest to wrap around my neck, flushing herself to me. I wrapped my arms even tighter around her waist, making sure there was no way she would be able to run away, not without getting through me.

I let out a small growl as she melted into me, playing with the hair at the nape of my neck. I could have stayed like his forever with her, especially when she parted to breathe for a minute and I started to kiss her neck. She shivered and the want and need that was building up inside me came spewing out as I smashed my lips back to hers.

I needed her so badly in wasn't even funny. I needed her smile, her voice, and her laugh. I needed her touch, and now I definitely just needed _her._

"Patrick," she whispered breathlessly to me when we separated for air.

"Kat," I whispered back, just as breathless.

"It's cute when your jealous," she commented, a smirk present on her face, her hand running through the hair at the nape of my neck repeatedly.

"Oh, I was _just_ cute?" I made a face at her, leaning my head back into her touch.

"Let's just say that you beating Blank up was the second best highlight of the evening," she told me, a smile starting to form on her face.

I leaned down to kiss her again and stopped to hover above her lips, "And the first?"

The smile on her face spread out even wider, "This," she assured me.

I brushed my lips with hers as she added, "I mean, how could I resist my _boyfriend_."

I smiled as a kissed her again, pleased to hear those words come out of her mouth. She made a small noise as my hand touched the bare skin at her back, but didn't say anything to me.

_I could get used to this_, I thought as she opened herself to me.

* * *

**Thank you to everyone who has been reading and reviewing. I really appreciate it. **

**Please leave a comment if you have any thoughts on this what-so-ever, even if the thought isn't human, I don't care. I really respect everyone's opinions and value the feedback you give me.**

**Until next time... **

**(Not gonna lie, can't wait for next weeks episode- the Katrick sex & break up)**


	8. Changes

In the past week I have found that "telling" Kat that she was my girlfriend was the best decision I could have made. When I look back on everything, I don't know why I was so scared of being with her. When I "told" her that she was my girlfriend, it was like she opened up to me in this whole new way.

Like tonight, for example. We went out on a date to dinner, and we were then supposed to go see one of her movies. In the restaurant, we were both giddy. We were all smiles and laughs, sometimes playing serious. We were high off of each other's energy, and not afraid to show it.

I told her I would run to the bathroom. Once I got in there I just stood and stared at at my reflection in the mirror. I thought how I had been feeling like his a lot lately. _Happy._ Kat made me happy, there was no doubt about it. She made me want to scream and shout, and just tell her everything about me and let her in completely. That's why I had the bathroom break. I needed a moment to myself, without her energy feeding me. I splashed some cool water on my face and got myself under control before leaving to go back out to her.

She was driving out of the parking lot after I had paid for dinner. Yes, I paid. I think even she was surprised when I had pulled out some cash. We had climbed in and she had started driving, the wind blowing in her hair. I couldn't resist her any longer. I grabbed her hand where it rested on the gear-shift, bringing it up to my lips. I trailed down her arm, my stomach fluttering as her laugh rang throughout the car. She pulled her hand away from me to concentrate on driving, but I kept coming back for more. She finally ripped her hand away from me to turn the wheel. She turned into a deserted parking lot. The minute the car was parked and turned off, seat-belts were unbuckled- and it was go time.

She flung herself at me, smashing her lips to mine. She grabbed my face in her hands to keep me in my place. I automatically started grabbing at her waist, trying to pull her closer to me in the small amount of space we had.

The kissing got hot and heavy fast. Our lips were greedy, desperate, _wanting_. That's all the did- they wanted more, more, and more.

It wasn't long until she broke away from me for a breather. She was peeling my shirt off in seconds, and I let her. Our lips automatically found each other in the dark again, and she soon started to take off her sweater. I kept my lips firmly against hers, tasting and sucking as I helped her out of it. Her sweater was thrown off to the side somewhere, along with my shirt.

I hadn't noticed before that she was wearing a form-fitting tank top underneath her sweater, and it caused me to want to press myself closer to her.

When I did this, she broke away from me, gasping.

"Patrick let's-," she said started urgently, her lips still pressed against mine as she leaned against me.

"-get tested," she finished in a rush.

"Not exactly what I thought you were gonna say- but," I paused to hold her head in my hands so I could nod mine, "sure."

Her hands raked up and down my chest, feeling me out before pushing me away at arms length. We were both panting and breathless and she said, "I'll make the appointment."

"You're a take charge girl," I commented as I ran down the length of her body with my eyes, "I like that about you."

I smiled at her and felt completely silly- like I was flying high. I had just told her one of the many things I _loved_ about her. We stared at each other for a moment, smiles on both of our faces. The minute our eyes wandered to each others lips, we both attacked. Lips smashing, her automatically opening her mouth to comply with my tongue.

My hand found its place in her hair, and her hand in mine. We were pulling and tugging at each other, stretching to the limits. I love her hair too, something else I could add to the list of things I love about Kat. She was also an amazingly good kisser, and was always willing to put up for a fight. Unlike our kiss from the other night, this kiss was hot, passionate, and _needy_. That kiss from the other night was like the tester- just to make sure the water was warm before diving under like this. It was slow and steady, and the second she jumped on me tonight I knew we were in for a ride.

* * *

I laughed and smiled with her as I walked down the hall Monday morning, her arm through mine, holding me close to her. When she did this I always felt like an old English gentleman, even though I was far from it.

"Our appointment's after school at three fifteen. The results take an hour," she told me, the smile that I had put there still present on her face as she kept close to me.

She paused to look away from me to ask shyly, "Have you given any thought to when and where we should... consummate."

I smirked at her, "I was thinking four fifteen. I'll be there behind the testing center."

Her eyes sparkled, "That's great. I'll meet you in the dumpster."

She smiled brightly at her own joke, making me smile just as brightly back at her.

We both leaned in at the same time to kiss. Our lips met and they moved swiftly and deeply with each other. My left hand held her hip while the other planted itself in her hair on the side of her face. Every time we kiss it gets more and more intimate, and I loved it. Her kisses still made heat pool in the pit of my stomach. When I broke away and saw the smile on her face, it made me realize how for once I _liked_ a girl, and not just lusted for her. Kat was special, like always. She was the girl that tightened my pants and stole my heart.

"Saturday night," I informed her, running my thumb down her cheek, caressing it.

I trialed my hand down her chin and neck, placing it on her chest for a moment as I added, "And don't worry it ain't gonna be in a dumpster."

She sighed as I turned to walk away, both of us grinning from ear to ear.

* * *

She dragged me after school with her to the clinic. Okay, I willing went with her to the clinic. If this was something she wanted to do before having sex I was willing to comply, just as long as I could have her in the end. _She was all I wanted_.

We walked hand in hand, and approached the lady at the front desk. The woman grabbed two clipboards and a pen and asked us to please take a seat and fill them out.

I sat next to Kat, taking a deep breath as I picked up my pen and started writing.

I finally turned to her and said, "This music is making me hot."

She laughed and answered darkly, "Maybe they sell the CD."

I made a humming noise in agreement and went back to the sheet.

I was on number six when she peered over at my sheet to peek at my answers, and I caught her just in time.

"Hey!" I exclaimed as I pulled the clipboard away from her, "curiosity killed the cat." _Pun intended_, I thought to myself.

"Yeah well, better it that STD," she backfired, covering for herself.

She was quiet for a minute before simply asking, "Seriously, how many girls have you slept with?"

"Let's see," I said, pausing and mumbling nonsense under my breath while I held my fingers up in the air, "311."

"Darn," she said automatically, "I've only slept with 300. I'll have to catch up."

I nodded in agreement with her as the door opened and a nurse walked out.

"You- cowboy. You're next." She turned to open the door for me.

"Giddy-up," I told Kat as I got up, placing the clipboard on the chair to walk away. I automatically turned around and grabbed it to take with me, so it was out of her reach as I walked off into the back of the clinic.

* * *

I walked out into the waiting room, and I was automatically met with a wide-eyed Kat. I could tell that she was worried.

"All clear," I told her as she sighed in relief.

"What took you so long? I got my results twenty-minutes ago."

"Sorry but the nurse made me put a condom on a banana. It's a lot harder than it looks," she scoffed at me and smiled back at me when I did, "Why? Were you nervous?"

"No," she said quickly. Obviously she had been nervous. She covered with, "I'm just sick of this music. Can we go?"

"We can go," I told her nodding my head. I raised my eyebrows and lowed my voice to slowly add, "all the way home."

She scoffed again as she hit my chest with the back of her hand. She walked by me and out the door. As we walked by a fishbowl filled with condoms, I smirked and made sure to pick a few up. I slipped them into my back pocket, just to make sure we were prepared for the upcoming events.

* * *

I was excited for Saturday's night. _Excited._ I even made sure I was prepared. I called Keith Friday night and asked to borrow his meth van. When I came over to pick up the key he was too stoned to care anyway.

I cleared out the back of it, using a staple gun to hang-up purple curtains and Christmas lights. I spread out cushions on the floor and covered them with blankets. I even made sure there were extra blankets for the after.

I had never put in this much effort for a girl before, and it felt good. In the end I was doing it all for her. She completely deserved it. She was becoming the light of my life whether I liked it or not, and I hoped that everything I was doing for her would show her how much I care about her and love her.

I picked her up and she smiled brightly at me as she climbed into the car. I leaned forward to kiss her lightly before driving off. She didn't ask where we were going, and I appreciated that she trusted me enough to take her were I wanted.

I brought her to one of my special spots. It was on a mountain overlooking the city. It was nice to look at and peaceful at times. I turned the car off as I pulled over to the side of the road and made sure to unbuckle my seat belt before anything could get started.

She looked around for a second before looking at me, "Seriously? We're gonna do it in the back of Keith's van? This isn't much better than a dumpster."

"You sure about that?" I turned around to pull back the curtain that I held put up earlier with the gun. She saw the twinkling lights, cushioned everything and pillows.

"How did you-"

"See," I interrupted her. I wasn't going to explain to her how I managed do this all before I picked her up. "I told you it would be special."

She looked at me, her eyes twinkling. We just looked at each other for a moment before leaning in for a soft kiss. The thing about Kat and I, we were both not so good with words when it came to this whole relationship thing. We had to learn how to read each other. With this one small kiss, I could feel the appreciation and gratitude that this one girl felt for me. That was all it took for me to be completely _hers_ for the night. Just one, simple kiss.

We slowly made our way to the back of the van, lying down. She was underneath me and doing just fine working on my lips. Just like last night, the kisses were hot, passionate, and _needy_. I needed her so much in my life and she didn't even know it. I needed to see her smile or hear her laugh to make it through the day. I needed her touch to relax me. Soon, my shirt was flung off and so was hers. My eyes roamed her newly exposed body. I made sure to come in eye contact with her before I let my hands start roaming over the unconquered territory. She enjoyed my stomach and chest, and loved pulling on my hair as she trailed her lips down my neck. I loved running my fingers though her hair, making it look like she just got out of bed.

As I kissed down her neck, she arched herself towards me and took my belt off. I pulled her pants off completely. I brought my lips back to hers as I felt the softness of her legs. She was smooth as silk, and I wanted her so badly.

She played with the hair at the nape of my neck. I pulled away from her to let her know just how important this was to me. She was opening up, and I was there to receive all of Kat Stratford. I'm considering myself one hell of a lucky guy.

When I pulled away slowly she smiled up at me.

"You know how long I've wanted to do this?" I asked her.

She looked at me with her eyebrows raised expectantly and didn't guess. I could only stare back into her eyes and rub her back and confess, "Since the first day I saw you at school."

She chuckled, "You mean that creepy stare off?"

"It wasn't creepy," I argued, "It was sexy."

She shook her head as she chuckled, "Don't forget who won that stare-off buddy. ME."

"I let you win. I only walked away because I knew it would drive you nuts."

"Mmm," she grinned up at me, "don't flatter yourself."

"I knew I'd get you eventually," I confessed, my voice dripping in want.

The minute her body tightened underneath my hands I knew something was wrong.

"You'd GET me?" She asked, eyebrows raised high.

"Well I'm about to aren't I?" I joked.

Her tone of voice wasn't so joking. "Is that what this is? Your master plan to get me to sleep with you? I'm just some sex object?"

"No," I told her right away. Why would she even think this? I tried to lighten to mood, "You talk way too much to be just a sex object."

I bent back down to kiss her and she pulled away, slowly getting up and reaching for her shirt to put back on.

"Come on. What just happened? Weren't we having fun?" I questioned her, my anger starting to boil inside me.

"I'm sorry did you want me to answer?" She stopped putting her shirt on to glare at me, "I thought I talked too much."

"You're over-reacting," I told her, plain and simple. I hated when she did this. She took something that I said and spun it around completely. It made me want to pick her up and shake some sense into her. I knew that it wasn't going to happen, and wouldn't help the situation.

"You're right. I should just be happy to be girl number 312." Sarcasm was dripping off every word she said as the venom behind them slapped me upside the head.

She was jealous and scared. She didn't want to have sex with me knowing that so many others girls have been with me before. It was such a compete lie, and for such a bright girl, she could be so dense sometimes.

"It that what this is about? You know I haven't slept with that many girls. I'm in high school not the NBA."

I watched her as she buttoned her shirt quickly.

"Do you bring them in here too? Do you and Keith run a little brothel on wheels?"

"Yeah. But don't worry, the first one's free." My voice was ice cold and all humor was gone from my face.

"Why are you freaking out? I thought that we both wanted to do this?"

"Just because I _want_ to have sex, doesn't mean I _should_. Certainly not with you," she words were cutting deep into my skin. "God, I mean I've been fooled by guys like you before, but not this time."

I sat there and stared at the side of her head as I tried to piece my thoughts together.

"Take me home," she ordered.

"With pleasure," were the only words I could manage to get out of my mouth.

* * *

I climbed in the front seat and pulled my shoes and shirt on. Kat stayed in the back of the car, most likely putting her pants on as I pulled away and drove her home.

The entire ride home I cursed her name and cursed myself for being so stupid. It couldn't have all been that easy. I was fooling myself this entire time when I thought that someone like her would be into a guy like me.

Her words hurt too. They had cut deep into my soul. I _loved _her, or I had thought I did until just a few moments ago. I had even planned to tell her now much I cared about her after the deed was done- but yet again she had to over react at the littlest slip up. Now all I wanted to do was drop her off at home so I could go punch something.

_I mean I've been fooled by guys like you before, but not this time. _

Those words echoed inside my head. So obviously she has been with other guys before and they had hurt her. I get it. She was scared, but so was I. Unlike her though, I was letting myself open up to someone for the first time. Someone who wasn't Leo, my therapist. I was so disappointed in her, and sad that she didn't just have the courage to come out and say something to me. I would have understood. I have started to realize that we are more alike then we give each other credit for.

We're both strong-headed, independent, closed-off, and scared to get our hearts broken. I couldn't understand why she was so upset. I was the one confessing my feelings for her. She was the one to take what I had said, spin it around, and smash my heart into tiny little pieces.

I finally pulled up in front of her house. She had managed to crawl into the passengers seat so she could buckle-up while I was driving. She got her things and opened the door. She didn't look back as she walked up to the house, pulling out her keys from her pocket.

I watched her walk away and unlock her front door. She turned and made eye contact with me as she was went to close the door. She raised her hand slightly in a goodbye gesture. I lifted my hand a little as well, peeling out of her neighborhood as fast as could.

I didn't look back as I drove to Keith's house. I parked the car in his driveway, leaning back in my chair to stare up at the black night sky. I thought about her.

_I gave you all of me, everything you could have wanted and more. __All I wanted- no all I needed was you, and you couldn't even give me that._

_

* * *

_

**Hey everyone!**

**Thank you once again for reviewing and being so supportive. I can honestly say it makes my day when I can say I got another review.**

**_So go ahead, make my day._**

**- artist1157**

**(Don't be afraid to tell me a screwed up on spelling/grammar, I could use a good kick every now and then.)**

**(Did anyone get the reference to episode 1.15 in the above italics? Or was it just me?)**

**(So excited for next week- so much is going on! 1 hour season finale- and show finale ;P)**


	9. Ain't No Mountain High Enough

Kat Stratford. Her name kept running through my mind every at every other thought. It was so hard _not_ to think about her. Her smile, her laugh, or how she tasted so _pure_ last night...

AGGGGGG! This is _so_ frustrating, and _so_ not me. It's not like me at all to be hooked on someone like this. I space myself from people for a reason, not just because I feel like it. Everyone I ever get close to eventually left me. They leave in general- it's a fact of life. People move on, they die. But in my case, they all have just left me. _Snap!_ and they're gone into thin air. I never understood what was so wrong with me, if I was the reason that all of these people were leaving.

I mean, first my dad left. Second came my mom. She left more mentally than anything else. She stopped caring about me and started working more. Then my family and close friends didn't want to be around me anymore. They claimed I was closing them off, and that I was pushing them away. To me, they were the ones pushing, and I was just pushing back. The only person I had left was Leo, but I only see him once a month and after a while, you start to go into denial when your only friend is your therapist.

That is one reason why I found Kat so interesting at first. She wasn't scared of being pushed away like everyone else, especially when she was doing a lot of closing off herself. So I decided it might be good to have a friend, and she has proved herself numerous times. But Kat... God, I loved her so much. I loved everything about her. Correction- _almost_ everything. I loved that she let me into her world. I loved her smile, her laugh, how she was witty and smart, and how she was genuinely beautiful. But there's always a downside to people, and I hated how she used anything I said against me, and how she let one word change our whole relationship.

When I told her I would _get_ her, I didn't mean it in a possessive way. I meant it in a figurative way. People say stuff like that all the time. _I'll get her someday_. They mean that someday they'll be with that person. That's what I was referring to when I told Kat I'd get her. I was telling her that I knew we would be together one day.

So I didn't mean for everything to go downhill. She over-reacted and put up her walls again, pushing me out even further.

* * *

We passed by each other in the courtyard at school earlier today. She was buried in some book and glanced up for a second. She saw me pass and we made eye contact. She opened her mouth to say something to me, but when I ignored her and kept walking away she quickly closed her trap and continued on her way. We both adverted our eyes as we passed, and I walked past her and down the hall. I wanted to get as far way from her as possible.

It was weird not talking to her. When I wasn't around her, it was so easy to plan what I was going to say to her the next time saw her. I wanted to explain that I was sorry, and hadn't meant the things I said to her. But every time I saw her in the flesh, it only reminded me as how she was the one who had freaked out and ruined the relationship. If she hadn't freaked out, we would still be walking to class together. It was so easy not to be angry with her when she wasn't there, standing in front of me. When I did see her the anger started to rise again. I couldn't bring myself to approach her when she didn't even have the guts to approach me first.

I decided to avoid her and wait to let her take the first stand. It was her mistake, she was the one to ruin our relationship. Now she had to be the bigger person and fix this. I avoided her the next day at school, and managed not to see her all day. I was ready to go home when Mindy caught my attention. I had gone out with her a couple times, and when things didn't work out I pushed her to the curb. I was doing what Leo would call _stupid and irrational_. I was flirting with another girl so the girl I now despised would get jealous. I know, I know- it's shallow and conceited. But this was a test that had to be taken.

I don't even remember the words that were exchanged in that five minute period. All I remember from after school was how my face hurt so much from "smiling". I also remember how my hands were sore from being stuffed down deep into my pant pockets, just so I couldn't slap myself across the face. The thing I remeber most though, is the way Kat eyes made there way over to over to me. I caught her only once, but that one time was enough to give me some hope that she saw me talking to this other girl. It was a warning for her. _Get me while you still can, or someone else will_.

She didn't come up and talk to me, so apparently that plan didn't work.

* * *

I ended up driving home after Kat lef school. I got home and jumped in the shower, trying to cool down my hot and sweating body. I shouldn't be so caught up with this, but it was weighing me down. I couldn't concentrate on doing homework, so I laid in bed and listened to the cars pass on the street, my room dark. When I heard my mom come home I knew that it was early morning. When my alarm rang at seven, I don't know how I even found the will power to force myself out of bed.

I made it to school without crashing into anything or hurting anyone, including myself. I was trying to find ways to entertain myself so I wouldn't drop dead in the middle of the hallway. I was passing to lunch, when I noticed Cameron kissing a note and trying, for minutes, to shove it into a locker.

I leaned down so I could look at his face. He paused and swallowed, "Is there anyway I could persuade you to keep moving?"

"I think we both know the answer to that," I told him, my face tired but dead-set. We both knew I wasn't leaving, not anytime soon.

"What's this?" My voice was flat and lifeless as I grabbed the note out of his hands.

"It's an invite to my little sisters birthday party, princess theme, she asked me to..." I held up the card to face him, raising my eyebrows at the red hearts and fancy writing, "... alright it's a love poem for Dawn. Okay?"

"Oh, did you write it in calligraphy?" I plastered a fake smile on my face and listened to my artificial laugh while I let Cameron grab the poem back.

"So what if I did?" Cameron looked down at his shoes to take a deep breath when I gave him a skeptical glare.

He explained, "Look, last night, on the phone- without thinking I said, 'I got to get some zzz's Dawn.' But I don't know if she was done talking, and now I feel horrible. So I wrote her a poem, so I could apologize."

"For saying goodnight?" Was this guy serious? He wrote his girlfriend a love poem to apologize for saying good-night? It's no wonder Bianca thought he was gay. "Nice backbone."

"Well better to tell Dawn how I feel then let her get away. That's the moral of every romantic- comedy." He scoffed at me and leaned back down to try to stuff the poem back into the locker, mumbling to himself.

I looked up to find Kat walking across the courtyard with some hippie chick, nodding her head, throwing it back to laugh. Even from far away, I knew if I was closer I would be able to see the sparkle in her eyes and feel the energy radiate off of her. As I watched her, I found that I couldn't take my eyes off of her. I also found myself wishing that I was standing next to her, being the one to make her laugh. I was the only one who used to be able to do that. Was I not good enough for her anymore?

"There, now she'll know how I feel in iambic pentameter," Cameron snapped my attention away from Kat as he hit my shoulder.

"Sorry," he said quickly, before turning and running away.

* * *

I thought about what Cameron had said to me earlier.

_It's better to tell her how you feel then let her get away._

How the hell was I supposed do that? Every time I opened my mouth I always find a way to say something wrong or screw something up. Besides that, I wasn't like Cameron. I didn't know how to be mushy and sensitive. I would have no idea what to say to her, or how to say it- without sending her running the other way.

_Tell her how you feel._

I made sure to take a deep breath before I approached her the next day at school. She was wearing winter clothing for some reason, but still managed to look adorable.

The only thing I could think to say was, "Hey."

She paused, not sure what to say either, "Hey back."

There was a pause, and I realized that neither of us knew what to say to the other.

"That's a really good look for you," I finally came up with.

"Thanks, I got it for my trip to Nepal. I leave next week," she nodded her head so I nodded back. I restrained myself from saying anything stupid, and kept my face placid.

"For three months," she continued. All I could do was nod my head and hold my expression, trying to process the information was she telling me.

"It's this fascinating study abroad program."

"Cool," I nodded my head, trying not to let my feelings pour out to her, "Have fun."

She started at me for a second, disappointed, "You too."

I groaned mentally as she slipped by me to head to her next class.

"Your poem is the most romantic things that any guy has ever done for me. Even after the time Chris Yu scratched my name on his guitar."

I turned to see Cameron pushing his girlfriend down the hall on his AV cart.

"Well I just wanted you to know that I couldn't live without you." I moved off to the side and leaned against the wall, trying to figure out why I felt so stupid- so _empty_.

"Ahhh, recite it to me again."

"Hark, my Dawn you are the sweetest treat in the candy store.

I've tasted your sugar and I want some more.

You're so hot you melt my heart.

Lips so sweet and delicious like a mixed brute tart.

You're cuter that Bambi, an adorable baby fawn.

You light up my days, my very own Dawn."

I watched them as they kissed and she hugged him, and I realized that for once, Cameron was helping me for a change- and he didn't even know it.

* * *

I got home and went through the same routine as the previous night. Except for the fact that I felt empty on the inside. Like there was nothing on the inside of me expect for space. It made me sick and wanted to crawl in a hole and stay there forever. The last time I had felt like this was after my dad left.

It had hit me like a bullet on the ride home. _Kat was leaving me. For three freaking months._

I actually almost swerved off of the side of the rode. I made it home without another incident. I was starting to realize why Cameron was so mushy. Girls like it, well some girls did at least. He got some by giving her some, and it was going great for them both.

Obviously Kat and I didn't have the healthiest relationship. Especially when she left me for dead. She had ripped my heart out, stomped all over it, and left it for rode kill. Now she was leaving me.

What more did she want from me? I gave her all of me, everything she could have asked for. And now she repays me by braking my heart and leaving me. WHAT?

The thing with Kat though, is that the minute she told me she was going to Nepal I knew it was over. She was through with me. Why else would she just pack up and leave in the middle of the school year? She found somewhere better to be than with me. I got it, I understood. I just wanted to know why? Why leave me now?

But then again, should I still care this much about her? She was the one that broke me in two. She played me beautifully and I loved and hated her for it. Now I wasn't sure if her leaving would make the pain worsen, but I'm pretty sure it will.

I didn't want this. I didn't want any of this to happen. I just wanted my Kat back. _My Kat._ She would kill me if she ever knew I thought about her in such a possessive way, but when you think about it, two people who love each other belong to each other in a sense. She belonged to me and I belonged to her. Even though we were still our own persons, we learned to lean on another and trust each other.

Without warning my eyes started to water. It took me long enough to realize that even though I was still mad at her, I had never stopped loving her. The only thing that she could do to me would be to tear my heart some more when she left- if that was even possible.

* * *

I waited for Kat the next day after school. I checked my pocket for the tool I needed to start this conversation, and I felt it in there. She was talking to her hippie friend again, and I made sure to keep a close eye on her as I walked up behind her.

"Hey," I greeted lamely.

"Hey back," she repeated, just like last time.

I took a shallow breath, "I'm glad I caught you before you left for Nepal."

"Really?" She asked, bouncing on her toes and fixing her shoulder strap, "Why?"

I felt around in my pocket for what I was looking for, "Keith found this, in the back of his van. I know how much you like it."

She looked at the earring I was holding up, surprised. "Thanks. I was wondering were it was," she finally said, grabbing it from me.

"Keith's van," I told her, like it was obvious, which it was. Plus, I couldn't think of anything better to say to her to keep the conversation rolling.

"Yeah, you said that." She acknowledged, shaking her head at me.

I opened my mouth slightly, and I couldn't find the right words to say. So many thought were flashing through my mind.

_Don't leave. I love you. I need you. Stay with me, please. _

None of them fit this situation. They all sounded too sappy and desperate, which in a way I was. When I tried to say any of them, the words got stuck in my throat, chocking me and holding me back. For once in my life I felt paralyzed when it came to talking to a girl. I had always been naturally charming, but with this particular topic and this particular girl, all I could do was nod my head and try to find a way to open my mouth.

When I didn't say anything she finally said, "I guess I'll see you around."

She turned from me and I managed to chocked out, "Have a safe trip."

No matter how strong she was, she couldn't mask the disappointment and devastation that was in her eyes when she turned away from me. I watched as she rolled her eyes, trying to mask the emotions that were threatening to spill over as she walked away.

It was final. She was actually leaving me.

I walked back to my bike, remembering the disappointment and devastation that I had found in her eyes, and how they must have matched the disappointment and devastation that I was letting seep through into my eyes. But with her she refused to read my eyes, and if she got the message I was trying to convey, she didn't say anything to me.

Why would she be disappointed and hurt? She was the one who had made the decision to leave, not me.

_Maybe she just wants to be told to stay_.

I turned to find her again but she was nowhere to be found. Just that one look, the look that had hurt her so much had inspired me. I almost smiled as I turned on my bike and shoved on my helmet. That one look could have meant many things, but to me, it meant that she may not be leaving me after all.

* * *

**Hi guys!**

**Please make sure to review! Tell me if you loved it/hated it. Sometimes I though it was a little OOC, but I just went with it. Patrick Verona is a wall, and no one really seems to know what's behind it- so took the liberty to give him a softer side this entire chapter. **

**I will try to get chapter 10 up ASAP, but the episode isn't up for free online yet (or if it is I don't know where to find it) so I must wait until the weekend to start it if I even get the chance.**

**THANKS SO MUCH!**


	10. Revolution

I hated this time of year. Voting time. It was when everyone plastered posters of themselves to the walls and said- _VOTE FOR ME! I'M BETTER THAN ANYONE ELSE AND DESERVE TO RUN THIS SCHOOL!_

So I guess you could say that it wasn't a surprise when I walked out of class to be met with a _KAT STRATFROD FOR PRESIDENT_ poster.

Well, at first I had to smile, knowing that I was right and that she didn't leave to go to Nepal. Kat was strong, but not strong enough to leave her family behind for three months.

I shook my head and walking into the foyer. I saw Kat talking to her sister and nonchalantly passed through talking to some guy from class, telling him about tonight's homework. Kat turned away from Bianca abruptly to approach me.

"Hey," I said like always.

"Hi," she exclaimed, way too happy for my taste. "As you can see, I didn't go to Nepal. Bianca begged me not to. It was pathetic."

"So you're still a fellow inmate huh?" I joked with her, not letting the tone of my voice reach my face.

"Yup. But I don't want to have to avoid each other in the prison yard. Just because we broke up doesn't mean we can't be civil."

I wasn't sure how to respond to that. I finally smirked nervously before saying, "Don't worry. I won't shank you."

"Cool. Well," She paused thinking of something to say, "I hope I can count on your vote."

I scowled at her this time. "Like I vote in these stupid elections."

She scoffed at me and rolled her eyes before turning to walk away. I turned around and smacked right into a _VOTE FOR KAT! _poster. I stared at it for a minute, telling myself that the picture of Kat that was on there made her look like she actually cared about the world. It was the sparkle in the eye that gave it away.

All I could do was roll my eyes and walk away, trying to avoid the multiple eyes watching me from the walls of Padua High.

* * *

The day of the election came, and it happened like it did every year. The school was called out to the courtyard to see the candidates' final videos before they voted. Every year I couldn't care less about who was running. This year, I just wanted to see how things played out. It was my ex against the guy I hated, so things were going to be very interesting.

Like always, Douche's performance was perfect. Clean cut, to the point. He even got the patriotic colors in there.

I leaned against the tree I was standing next to, taking it all in, waiting for Kat's video to load onto the TV. When it did and she started talking, I'm sure that even she was surprised what popped up into the screen.

"I want to be President because... well, the truth is, every morning I wake up and I think, '_Who are these people? Why am I the only person who cares about anything that matters?_'. And then every morning I remember they're idiots. They have tiney-tiny little pea brains that can only process information in the form of a tweet, a ring-tone or status update. And if they're not gonna think for themselves, they need someone _like me_ to think for them."

The screen turned black and Kat slowly turned, mouth gapping. I stared at the screen in surprise, wondering why the hell that was up there. I looked at Kat, whose eyes were searching the crowd of endless booing. She must have found whom she was looking for, for her eyebrows raised and her anger flashed across her face. She looked down and was storming out of the courtyard when Douche came running after her.

He grabbed her arm to spin her around, "Please believe me when I tell you I had nothing to do with this."

"Right." Kat left, storming down the hall. I was left standing there, stunned at what had just played out in front of me.

Holland's voice come on the microphone, "Okay then, well everyone grab a ballot and vote on your way out. Even though we already know who's won."

People lined up to vote, and I made sure I stayed there until the room was empty. I grabbed one of the last ballots, checking off Kat's name before putting my ballot into the box.

I knew that Kat wouldn't have put that video up, especially judging by her reaction to it when she saw it go up on the screen. But I have to admit, it sounded like something that Kat would say. I could picture her giving that little spiel anywhere, especially to me.

I honesty felt bad for her though. Someone sabotaged her chances at winning, and if I could find Douche I would make sure to beat him up so badly he wouldn't even be able to crawl to his little party tonight.

Walking out of school, I made sure to grab a poster that remained in the hall, one from Kat's campaign. I took a sharpie from a kid and wrote in all caps, _I VOTED FOR_, above her name on the poster.

I walked outside only to find that someone had moved her car and it was covered in food. People were throwing things at it as they walked by. I sat on my bike, holding up my poster and waiting for her. She would find me eventually, for there was no way that she would be driving home when her car was in such a state. Besides, I wanted everyone to know that I voted for her. My first vote ever in a school election went to her. I didn't care who knew about it. No one was going to say anything to me about it anyway. The only person that needed to see this was Kat.

I made the poster for a lot of different reasons. It was mainly to show her that no matter what happens, I'd be there for her whether she knew it or not. I was telling her that she could trust me, and that I would always support her no matter what. I was conveying to her so much, just by holding up a sign.

I knew that she would find me. She was standing, staring at her car when the bus moved. She looked up and saw me sitting there, holding my sign. Her eyes met mine and her tense shoulders slumped in defeat. I small smile appeared on her face when she read what I wrote. I tossed the sign on the ground as a got up to walk over to her.

She turned to face me as I walked around her car. Her eyes were watery and her lip was wobbling the slightest. I closed my eyes and wrapped my arms around her neck, pulling her in close to me and breathing in her scent. I held her close, comforting her. I was telling her how much I cared about her. She wrapped her arms around my waist, burying her head in the crock of my neck.

"Looks like you could use I ride home," I finally said.

She didn't respond for a minute, and took a deep breath before pulling back.

She look at me and smiled a little, "Yeah, that would be great."

I brought her into a hug one more time before grabbing her hand and pulling her over to my bike.

"We can come get your car in the morning."

"Hopefully the birds will have eaten most of what's on there," she said, looking skeptically at her car.

"Naw," I shook my head at her, "You could just get your sister and her friends to put on their bikini's and scrub your car."

I paused for a minute to get on my bike and put the key in the ignition, "Or even better, you could do it."

She jokingly hit my arm as she sat behind me and shoved the helmet on her head before wrapping her arms around my waist.

No more was said before I gunned the engine and peeled out of the parking lot.

* * *

So I drove her home, her arms wrapped around my waist, feeling so good and exhilarating. The hole that she had made in me was closing up again, only to be filled her some more.

I think she experienced a high and crash from riding on the back of the bike because the second I turned off the engine in front of her house, she jumped off and ran inside. I followed her as she ran upstairs to throw her stuff on the floor. I took my shoes off when she did and placed my bag gently next to hers. I turned to take off my leather jacket, and when I spun to face her, she was there climbing into bed.

She looked even more tired in the dark. From under the covers she weakly called, "Left side."

I was surprised at first, and made sure to walk over to the bed as slowly as possible. I climbed into the side closer to the wall and waited. After a minute of lying on my back felt her move again. I allowed her to lay her head on my chest and she let me wrap my arms around her waist. She exhaled loudly and was soon asleep.

This was so unlike Kat it was almost funny. She normally didn't open up like this and let some one comfort her and take care of her for a change. I'm pleased to say that the guy she opened up to was _me_.

I soon fell asleep playing with her hair, and woke up when she stirred. Her hands pressed down on my chest, and I coughed when she knocked the wind out of me.

"Sorry!" She cried quickly, making sure I was okay.

Once I caught my breath I raised my eyebrows teasingly, "No problem. You always did know how to take my breath away."

She settled back into her bed whacked my arm. She turned her head to face mine, and I'm sure we both felt the energy that was vibrating between us.

I felt her arms slowly snake around my neck as my eyes closed. When her lips met mine I wrapped my arms around her waist to hold her against me. The kiss was slow and deep. We just needed each other at this point. We needed to feel the love, the compassion, and the care that we had for each other. All of this was said in one simple kiss.

We kept the kissing slow, feeling each other, tasting each other, and conveying everything that wanted and needed to be said to one another.

The minute she wrapped her legs around my waist, my hands dove into her hair pulling and tugging on her. Soon, we were panting, moving around all over the bed.

My lips trailed over her skin, tasting and memorizing her. She even leaned her head back for me, gaining me better access to her neck. While I was busy running my hands through her hair and kissing her neck and mouth, she was busy feeling me out. Her hands roamed all over my chest, going up and down tracing patterns on my back. Her finger pads were hot, and she laughed against my mouth when I shivered against her.

I pulled back and we locked eyes, and the energy jolted us alive. Her eyes were dark, filled with want and desire. They most likely mirrored mine. We both attacked the other at the same time, our lips and hands craving for more. Soon my shirt was off, strewn somewhere across the room. She broke away to suck on my earlobe and trail her warm lips all over my neck and collarbone. I kept my hands in her hair as she unbuckled my belt and unbuttoned my pants. She gave me an evil smile before unzipping my jeans with her teeth and pulling my pants off.

I snatched her away from the bottom half of me as I smashed my lips back onto hers, allowing the passion, love, and raw hunger I felt for her shine through. She gasped in surprise, which allowed my tongue to wiggle into her mouth.

I pulled away for a breather after we battled for possession for her mouth and eyed her body, which was still fully clothed.

"Why I am the only one unclothed here?" I asked breathlessly before pulling her up against me to help her shrug out of her sweater and pull her shirt over her head. She unbuttoned and unzipped her pants and pulled them off, tossing them aside with all the other clothing.

I smiled at her, moving her hair out of her face.

"That's more like it," I whispered to her while bringing her legs around my waist, so she was straddling me. I loved how she felt underneath my fingertips. She was so soft and smooth as if she could be made of porcelain, something easily breakable. But when my hand moved to cup her breast and she bit on my lower lip, it reminded me how strong and capable my girlfriend was.

My _girlfriend_. It was nice to be able to call her that again. She wouldn't believe how much I missed her, even though she was just always down the hall at school.

My thoughts were interrupted when she started kissing down my chest, and had to stop and pull her up so I could access her mouth again.

Our lips and hands became even more frantic. She was over me, hands pulling and tugging on my hair while her legs wrapped around my waist even tighter. It gave me the chance to explore her mouth and let my hands explore her chest. It didn't take long for me to find her bra clasp, undoing it quickly. Her hands left their spot from messaging my head to take it off her arms. All I could do was stare at her for a moment, before slowly moving my hands up from her waist, sliding the over her stomach and up to caress her. My lips trailed down her skin before I took her in my mouth.

Her hands wrapped around my neck tightly and her head leaned back as she moaned. She arched her back, pressing herself even closer to me.

"Patrick?" she panted.

I didn't answer. I was to busy biting her and taking her in.

"You don't know what you're doing to me," she admitted breathlessly.

I pulled back to bask in her glow, slowly reaching up to suck on her pulse point making her sigh in pleasure and tighten her grip on my hair.

"I think I know what I'm doing Kat," I whispered to her and looked her in the eye to admit. "I really don't know if you know what you're doing to me right now."

She smirked at me, sliding her right hand down my chest to lightly squeeze my hardness.

"I think I know what I'm doing Patrick," she teased, throwing my words back in my face.

I growled at her, surprising her by flipping so I was lying on top of her.

She laughed quietly and I nodded my head, "It's good that someone knows what they're doing, because things are about to get a little messy."

She raised her eyebrows at me, and fully understood my meaning when my fingers grabbed her panties, tugging them off of her.

She bucked her hips up into me, helping to hurry the process. Soon, my boxers were off and she was reaching into her nightstand to grab a condom.

"This. Will. Come. In. Handy." She said between kisses.

Soon things _did_ get dirty, as we were hot, bothered, and throbbing for each other.

I was on top when I first entered Kat. Unlike one would expect, she didn't throw her head back or move from were she was. Her body did tense, and she relaxed as we formed a steady rhythm with each other. Soon she was on top, being in control and letting me sit back and watch her. She was so lovely and beautiful, and _amazing_ at everything she does. And I mean _everything_.

When our time came and passed we both sighed in pleasure and she cried out, finally collapsing on my chest. I held her there for a minute, just happy about the fact that we finally _connected_ and wanted her stay as close to me as possible. She soon rolled over to the side so I wouldn't have any of her weight on me, not like I minded though.

She closed her eyes and drifted off. I watched her, the sheets she pulled over us moving with her chest as she breathed steadily. I brushed the hair off her face and she mumbled something, but I was unable to catch it. As she smiled a small smile, I wondered how the hell I was so lucky to get a girl like Kat in my life.

* * *

I eventually drifted off as well. When we both came to it was late into the evening, and when I looked into her eyes I knew I was accepted. I knew that she was okay and that she was happy, and I realized that mattered so much to me.

I turned so that I was facing her, and placed my hand on her hip, pulling her closer to me.

I smiled and laughed, "Well that was fun."

"Eh," she commented, wrinkling her noise and shrugging her shoulders.

"This is like a new record for us. We haven't gotten into one single fight." The minute I said it I knew it was true. We normally couldn't go five minutes without arguing, and we had just gone hours without it. Maybe this is a sign, showing us that we're better off _with_ each other instead of trying to push each other away. I think that after we had sex, it allowed the both of us to break down our walls a little more, sharing ourselves with the other. I could feel the air between us had changed, and we were both as happy as could be right now.

"See this is what the world needs. More sex, less war."

I raised my eyebrows teasingly, "Now if that had been your campaign slogan you would have won."

Her laugh filled the room and my stomach fluttered. God, even after we had connected on so many levels and in so many different ways I still wasn't immune to how my stomach and heart reacted when I was around her.

_Maybe this is what it's like to be around someone you love._

She must have seen some of these feelings shine through in my eyes, because her smile faded and she didn't reply as her eyes searched mine. I leaned in slowly for a sweet, chaste kiss from her, pulling her closer to me.

We pulled back and Kat kept her eyes closed and laid her head on the pillow. She finally opened her eyes and let out a shaky sigh.

We just looked at each other for a moment, eyes searching for any hidden meanings. She sat up, loosely holding the sheet to her chest while resting on her elbow.

"Can I ask you a favor?" She said, her voice low.

I sat up too, holding my head up in my hand.

"Mmm," I nodded at her to go on.

"Don't break my heart, okay?" Her eyes portrayed everything else she didn't say. The care and _love_ that she felt for me floored me, and all I could do was stupidly nod my head and reply with, "Okay."

I took a small breath, "Can I ask you a favor?"

She smiled at me, "What is it?"

_Don't break my heart either, okay?_

The words were on my tongue as I held her close, but a certain male adult rudely interrupted me.

"I hear that someone could use a hug!" Walter exclaimed as he burst through the door.

Kat and I immediately sat up, frozen like a freaking deer in headlights.

I couldn't see Walter's face color as he assessed the situation, but I'm sure if I could it would either be bright red or dark purple.

He shook his head at us and raised his eyebrows. "I'm not leaving."

Kat turned to me, her mouth opened in surprise. A look of pure distress was written all over her face as well, as she grasped the covers tighter around her body. I'm pretty sure my face mirrored hers and quickly closed my mouth when I found I had nothing to say.

_Shit. We are so dead._

Kat turned back to her father. All I could do was fall back on her bed in defeat. I grabbed the pillow and covered my face to stifle my groan, wishing that Walter would just go away so that Kat and I could return to the lovely night that we _were_ having.

* * *

**Hey everyone!**

**Please REVIEW! If you do I would like you to tell me:**

**A) if you loved/hated this story or chapter**

**B) if you think I should do a prequel (the first ten episodes) or a sequel (my thoughts on whatever happens after this)**

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**As always- thank you so much!**

**Goodbye until next time...**

**- artist1157**


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